Arranging a carer for Dad - questions to ask

[Bay21]

Hello,

I'm starting the process of looking for extra help with my Dad. I've started to look at some private carers as I was advised they may be a bit more flexible in what they offer help with.

I just wondered if anyone has any tips for what sort of questions I should be asking them? I have a few questions but also don't want to miss anything glaringly obvious.

Thank you

 

[AliceA]

I think it may be important to find out what they dislike doing and what they will not do as well as what they can do. I am sure others will have other ideas.
I would also ask whether they were self employed and responsible for tax etc.
Perhaps it is worth checking with the helpline.

 

[LadyA]

I've been approached several times to know if I would take on private care work. (I don't). I have to say, I've been quite shocked at times at how little those trying to engage me seem to want to know about me or want to tell me about what exactly the job entails! What they are most interested in, it seems, is how little can they get away with paying me! Talking to one woman, having explained that I don't take private work, I told her what she should be looking for (considering she was offering me the job of staying regularly overnight with a 92 year old woman, without even meeting me!): I explained that she might be better to have two for the actual washing/dressing and if the person needed lifting out to the toilet during the night ("Ah, no, not really. Just once or twice. Maybe three times." ) then that was quite risky to have one person doing that.

So, if I were you, before you approach anyone, have a think about exactly what work is involved, and write down a list of tasks that you envisage the Carer will be expected to do. You need to be realistic about this. If the person they will be working with can have challenging behaviour or can be aggressive, then it's better to say so than have what happened to a care worker I know! She turned her back on a client and got a frying pan over the head!! (I had to prise out of the lady mentioned above that the elderly woman did, indeed, have dementia. "Ah no. She's just very elderly. Well, maybe. Yes. I suppose she does, really." ) Is it mostly for washing/dressing/toileting/meals or is there some light housework involved? And do define what housework you expect done. If providing a meal, do you envisage them cooking from scratch, or heating up ready cooked meals? What experience do they have? Can they let you have references? Do they have any training? And, as has been said, are they self employed or will you be their employer?

 

[Sirena]

When you say 'private carers' what do you mean? Do you mean you are approaching individuals, or will you go via an agency?

My mother had self-funded care from an agency, starting at 4 hours a day and ending in 6 (at that point she needed supervision 24/7 and moved to a care home). The agency was very flexible about what they did - basically, whatever I asked. They would help her to dress, bathe, prepare meals, take her shopping, take her to doctor's appointments or to the park, do the laundry and any housework, and sit and keep her company. She was still mobile so didn't need any help on that score. Because care was via an agency they would arrange cover when her usual carer was not available, so there were never any gaps in care.

 

[Bay21]

I've been approached several times to know if I would take on private care work. (I don't). I have to say, I've been quite shocked at times at how little those trying to engage me seem to want to know about me or want to tell me about what exactly the job entails! What they are most interested in, it seems, is how little can they get away with paying me! Talking to one woman, having explained that I don't take private work, I told her what she should be looking for (considering she was offering me the job of staying regularly overnight with a 92 year old woman, without even meeting me!): I explained that she might be better to have two for the actual washing/dressing and if the person needed lifting out to the toilet during the night ("Ah, no, not really. Just once or twice. Maybe three times." ) then that was quite risky to have one person doing that.

So, if I were you, before you approach anyone, have a think about exactly what work is involved, and write down a list of tasks that you envisage the Carer will be expected to do. You need to be realistic about this. If the person they will be working with can have challenging behaviour or can be aggressive, then it's better to say so than have what happened to a care worker I know! She turned her back on a client and got a frying pan over the head!! (I had to prise out of the lady mentioned above that the elderly woman did, indeed, have dementia. "Ah no. She's just very elderly. Well, maybe. Yes. I suppose she does, really." ) Is it mostly for washing/dressing/toileting/meals or is there some light housework involved? And do define what housework you expect done. If providing a meal, do you envisage them cooking from scratch, or heating up ready cooked meals? What experience do they have? Can they let you have references? Do they have any training? And, as has been said, are they self employed or will you be their employer?

Thank you for your reply, alot to think about. I will definitely prepare a bit more information about Dad as I will admit I had mainly considered what to ask them and not what they might want to know from me.

 

[Bay21]

When you say 'private carers' what do you mean? Do you mean you are approaching individuals, or will you go via an agency?

My mother had self-funded care from an agency, starting at 4 hours a day and ending in 6 (at that point she needed supervision 24/7 and moved to a care home). The agency was very flexible about what they did - basically, whatever I asked. They would help her to dress, bathe, prepare meals, take her shopping, take her to doctor's appointments or to the park, do the laundry and any housework, and sit and keep her company. She was still mobile so didn't need any help on that score. Because care was via an agency they would arrange cover when her usual carer was not available, so there were never any gaps in care.

Hi Sirena, thank you for your reply. At the moment I am looking at both but was leaning more towards an individual. My only experience has been with my Nan's carers which were arranged via the Council and they were very rigid in what they could or would do. I need help in terms of meal prep, housework and possibly going to the odd appointment reasoning being I'm about to have my second child. Pehaps an individual from a cover point of view would not be ideal.

 

[Bay21]

I think it may be important to find out what they dislike doing and what they will not do as well as what they can do. I am sure others will have other ideas.
I would also ask whether they were self employed and responsible for tax etc.
Perhaps it is worth checking with the helpline.

Hello, thank you for your reply

 

[Sirena]

Hi Sirena, thank you for your reply. At the moment I am looking at both but was leaning more towards an individual. My only experience has been with my Nan's carers which were arranged via the Council and they were very rigid in what they could or would do. I need help in terms of meal prep, housework and possibly going to the odd appointment reasoning being I'm about to have my second child. Pehaps an individual from a cover point of view would not be ideal.

I can imagine Social Services carers would be very rigid because there isn't the budget for doing anything other than the absolute basics. But if you are paying privately carers should be much more flexible and do whatever is needed. I lived a long distance from my mother so I could not do hands-on care or take her to appointments, so she had a daily carer from 9am to 1pm. Obviously you can choose a shorter timespan but equally the carer needs time to accomplish what you need.