APPROACHING END WITH MUM : EVERY DAY IS DIFFERENT

[Jezzer]

Good morning
An earlier visit than normal to mum today, foolishly thinking it might be a bit cooler. Despite the storms, it feels hotter than ever.
No response from my precious one today but what was said yesterday will remain firmly in my mind. Mum was actually chuckling in her sleep this morning - I took great comfort from that. My dad was a great joker. Perhaps he is making her laugh, perhaps she is remembering some of the hilariously funny moments we've had with her. Oh I could fill a book. I am thinking of the many times we'd catch each other's eye and start laughing - neither of us knowing why. Dementia, you have robbed mum and my brother and I of so much but not even the cruel, evil, sadistic beast that is you, you cannot take our precious memories, nor the immense mutual love that will still remain, long after you've gone. Keep having those happy thoughts mum. Love to you all and wishing you strength today xxx

 

[kindred]

Good morning
An earlier visit than normal to mum today, foolishly thinking it might be a bit cooler. Despite the storms, it feels hotter than ever.
No response from my precious one today but what was said yesterday will remain firmly in my mind. Mum was actually chuckling in her sleep this morning - I took great comfort from that. My dad was a great joker. Perhaps he is making her laugh, perhaps she is remembering some of the hilariously funny moments we've had with her. Oh I could fill a book. I am thinking of the many times we'd catch each other's eye and start laughing - neither of us knowing why. Dementia, you have robbed mum and my brother and I of so much but not even the cruel, evil, sadistic beast that is you, you cannot take our precious memories, nor the immense mutual love that will still remain, long after you've gone. Keep having those happy thoughts mum. Love to you all and wishing you strength today xxx

Oh my darling, what a beautiful, inspiring and bittersweet post. Chuckling, catching each other's eye - and it is those collusive moments that are so so wonderful. I so wish you would fill a book ... I will stand in line to read it. all love, Gxx

 

[Jezzer]

Oh my darling, what a beautiful, inspiring and bittersweet post. Chuckling, catching each other's eye - and it is those collusive moments that are so so wonderful. I so wish you would fill a book ... I will stand in line to read it. all love, Gxx

Well that's made me smile G. I doubt I'de get such a book published, let alone manage to sell it! But, Thank You anyway! It is still so oppressive here. Is it the same your way? Looking forward to reading your daily update! Much Love, Jan xxx

 

[Toony Oony]

Hi @Jezzer - glad to hear that even though your Mum was asleep, she was having sweet dreams.

My family are all only girls of only girls .... and guess what? I have just one daughter too!
Mum and I have always had such fun together and your post unearthed a memory of one occasion from way back that may make you laugh on this hot, sticky afternoon:
It was in the early 70's and as a 'dedicated follower of fashion' I used to wear the most ridiculously high platform soles. Mum always dressed well, but for comfort. We had about half a mile walk back from the shops and one of my shoes was rubbing. 'We could swap?' said Mum. I told her there was no way I would be seen wearing her shoes. 'Well why not one of each?' she offered, 'we'd each have a matching pair'. I said it would be impossible to walk with one flat shoe and one phenomenally high one. 'Oh yes we can, like this' said Mum .... so we wore one of each shoe and then walked all the way home on opposite sides of the road with the platform-soled foot in the gutter and the flat one on the kerb!
So many crazy, happy memories .... it would be so lovely to reminisce with Mum and relive them ... I just like to think that they are not totally lost but still buried in her brain somewhere, even though she now lacks the ability to recall them.

X

 

[Jezzer]

Hi @Jezzer - glad to hear that even though your Mum was asleep, she was having sweet dreams.

My family are all only girls of only girls .... and guess what? I have just one daughter too!
Mum and I have always had such fun together and your post unearthed a memory of one occasion from way back that may make you laugh on this hot, sticky afternoon:
It was in the early 70's and as a 'dedicated follower of fashion' I used to wear the most ridiculously high platform soles. Mum always dressed well, but for comfort. We had about half a mile walk back from the shops and one of my shoes was rubbing. 'We could swap?' said Mum. I told her there was no way I would be seen wearing her shoes. 'Well why not one of each?' she offered, 'we'd each have a matching pair'. I said it would be impossible to walk with one flat shoe and one phenomenally high one. 'Oh yes we can, like this' said Mum .... so we wore one of each shoe and then walked all the way home on opposite sides of the road with the platform-soled foot in the gutter and the flat one on the kerb!
So many crazy, happy memories .... it would be so lovely to reminisce with Mum and relive them ... I just like to think that they are not totally lost but still buried in her brain somewhere, even though she now lacks the ability to recall them.

X

Hi @Jezzer - glad to hear that even though your Mum was asleep, she was having sweet dreams.

My family are all only girls of only girls .... and guess what? I have just one daughter too!
Mum and I have always had such fun together and your post unearthed a memory of one occasion from way back that may make you laugh on this hot, sticky afternoon:
It was in the early 70's and as a 'dedicated follower of fashion' I used to wear the most ridiculously high platform soles. Mum always dressed well, but for comfort. We had about half a mile walk back from the shops and one of my shoes was rubbing. 'We could swap?' said Mum. I told her there was no way I would be seen wearing her shoes. 'Well why not one of each?' she offered, 'we'd each have a matching pair'. I said it would be impossible to walk with one flat shoe and one phenomenally high one. 'Oh yes we can, like this' said Mum .... so we wore one of each shoe and then walked all the way home on opposite sides of the road with the platform-soled foot in the gutter and the flat one on the kerb!
So many crazy, happy memories .... it would be so lovely to reminisce with Mum and relive them ... I just like to think that they are not totally lost but still buried in her brain somewhere, even though she now lacks the ability to recall them.

X

Oh Toony, that is so funny - I'm trying to picture you both - hilarious! That's just the sort of daft thing mum and I would do!!! Although your mum lacks the ability to recall the memories, I firmly believe they will be stored somewhere in her mind. And, of course, they are precious memories you will always have. Thank You so much for sharing this personal and oh so funny glimpse of your past with us. Oh those platform shoes - what were we thinking??!!! Hope you are as OK as you can be Toony, given your circumstances. Sending Love to you and all of us in the shadow of this cruel disease. Take care and Thank You again Jan xxxx

 

[Jezzer]

This just came to me:

On your lovely face appears a smile
Disease forgotten for a while
Loving words so clearly spoken
A deep bond of love, never broken
Sleep well Dear Mum, the sweetest dreams
You've shown us just what true love means

 

[Jezzer]

Thank you. I used to write a lot of verse. This is my first in many years. I bet you're shattered tonight. Well done for getting through this first week. Much Love Jan

 

[Kikki21]

Thank you. I used to write a lot of verse. This is my first in many years. I bet you're shattered tonight. Well done for getting through this first week. Much Love Jan

Well @Jezzer Jan - one of my friends had a dream to write a book for many years & guess what she has done it, it’s getting published! So never say never.
I’m glad you have those memories with your mum. In a way, I am quite envious because my mum & I didn’t really have a close relationship but she came from a different era & culture. Xxx

 

[kindred]

Well that's made me smile G. I doubt I'de get such a book published, let alone manage to sell it! But, Thank You anyway! It is still so oppressive here. Is it the same your way? Looking forward to reading your daily update! Much Love, Jan xxx

OO you might! Yes, oppressive but incredibly windy but hardly any rain. More anon! Gxx

 

[Jezzer]

Well @Jezzer Jan - one of my friends had a dream to write a book for many years & guess what she has done it, it’s getting published! So never say never.
I’m glad you have those memories with your mum. In a way, I am quite envious because my mum & I didn’t really have a close relationship but she came from a different era & culture. Xxx

Yes never say never but doubtful! I'm sorry you were not close to your mum but, yes, different era and culture understandable. You are doing all you can for her now and that's what counts. Xxxx Take care Love J

 

[Jezzer]

OO you might! Yes, oppressive but incredibly windy but hardly any rain. More anon! Gxx

Hello Geraldine - raining & gusty here. A bit fresher but still hot. Look forward to hearing from you later. Much Love to you and Keith xxxx Jan

 

[Lindy50]

Morning (just!) Jan @Jezzer
Hope you’re okay and that you have a good visit if you are able to see your Mum today.
How are you feeling? I feel really cream crackered even though it is a bit cooler. Think the heat is catching up with me! Might go for a cheeky lie down soon.....
Love
Lindy xx

 

[Jezzer]

Morning (just!) Jan @Jezzer
Hope you’re okay and that you have a good visit if you are able to see your Mum today.
How are you feeling? I feel really cream crackered even though it is a bit cooler. Think the heat is catching up with me! Might go for a cheeky lie down soon.....
Love
Lindy xx

Hi there Lindy
My brother and I have just got home from seeing mum. She was fast on all the time we were there. Again, she looked peaceful and not distressed so we took turns holding her hand and and talking to her. Feel sad but she obviously needs to sleep. Physically I'm so much better Thank You. No more blackouts and although I'm still getting the ectopic beats, they are definitely not so bad. I too feel cream crackered. What a week - relentless and overwhelming heat. Not good. A lie-down is a great idea. Hopefully you can catch up on the sleep you've missed. How are things with your dear Mum? I really hope the distress you felt a short while ago has eased. We all carry on and on and then it all crashes down and no wonder. Please look after yourself my friend. Much Love to you, your mum and your family. Jan xxxx

 

[Kikki21]

@Jezzer how are you feeling today Jan? I hope it is a bit cooler for you & you feel better for it. I know I certainly do! Although they are saying it will be a short respite from the heat & that it will get hot again & now we are all moaning about the rain!
Xxxx

 

[Jezzer]

Hi Monika
I go to have my "portable" ecg fitted today so feel a bit anxious although things haven't been so bad. Then off to see mum. I am glad for the cooler weather but, yes, the dreaded heat looks to be on its way back! Thanks for asking Love J xxx

 

[Kikki21]

Hi Monika
I go to have my "portable" ecg fitted today so feel a bit anxious although things haven't been so bad. Then off to see mum. I am glad for the cooler weather but, yes, the dreaded heat looks to be on its way back! Thanks for asking Love J xxx

Ah at least once it is done with the ecg then hopefully the docs will know the bigger picture & I reckon it will all be stress related. I have just emailed the care home where my mum is & told them to tell her that I have been feeling unwell so stayed away but all being well, that I will be in tomorrow & I have chased the COP3 form.
I’m not sure what is going to happen with from there but next stage is getting valuations done on the bungalow. Hope your mum is ok today & is on form xxxx

 

[Jezzer]

Thank you xxxx

 

[Jezzer]

Hi all. Had ECG fitted this morning and then to see mum. Im sorry guys but I just need a bit of time before I post properly. Difficult day so please bear with me. Will post again soon. Thanks J xx

 

[Kikki21]

Hi all. Had ECG fitted this morning and then to see mum. Im sorry guys but I just need a bit of time before I post properly. Difficult day so please bear with me. Will post again soon. Thanks J xx

Sorry to hear this Jan, I hope you are as ok as you can be. Take your time xxxx

 

[Lindy50]

Hi all. Had ECG fitted this morning and then to see mum. Im sorry guys but I just need a bit of time before I post properly. Difficult day so please bear with me. Will post again soon. Thanks J xx

Dearest jan @Jezzer
I’m sorry to hear this. Take your time, will hear from you when you’re ready xxx