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Anyone out there

Emma Jo

Registered User
Oct 25, 2007
My husband has been diagnosed with Alzheimers at just 58 years old. He is responding to Aricept but he gets very worked up over the smallest thing. he used to be so loving and I find it very difficult at times. I find myself wondering what each day will bring. He is very interested in railway modelling so I converted our dining room into a room where he can set up his trains. This has not had the desired effect of giving him something challenging to do as he gets confused at times. At such a young age I wonder what else I can do to make life better for him. He does not like me to talk to people about him and refuses to go to local meetings. This makes it very lonely for me as I feel I am on my own dealing with this. My 2 daughters are not local but I can text them. Thank you for letting me get this out of my system.:)

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Dear Emma. Welcome to TP.

We are hearing of more and more people being diagnosed with Alzheimers and it`s becoming quite frightening. It must be extremely hard for you.

The loneliness of carers is felt by all of us, especially those of us who are caring 24/7 and husbands/wives/partners are unable or unwilling to have any outside imput.

My husband was diagnosed 2 years ago and only recently has been persuaded to attend a Memory Clinic and support group.

I`m so pleased you`ve found TP, for it has been a life saver for those of us who feel so isolated, and offers support, information and friendship with others who know what life is like for sufferers and carers alike.

It is not easy to try to make life better for our nearest and dearest who have this condition. All we can do is our best to provide the security and support they need.

Finding ways to occupy confused minds is virtually impossible, as what might work one day may be useless the day after. It`s all trial and error. I have borrowed some table games from my grandchildren, scrabble, snakes and ladders, chess and draughts etc. We have had them a couple of weeks and they are still unused.

Now you`ve made the first move, keep posting and for you at least, there might be some relief.

Take care

Love xx


Registered User
Jul 31, 2007
Dear Emma Jo,
Welcome to Talking Point and one thing I can say is someone always seems to be on line 24/7. My husband was diagnoised at 58. Each day we struggle through a fog, trying to do the best we can for our loved ones.
I do wish you the very best. Keep posting. Christine


Registered User
Oct 16, 2007
manchester, uk
Hi Emma Jo

Welcom to TP. I am sorry to hear about your husband. I am glad you have found TP and as Christine has said there is always someone on line 24/7, so please don't feel you are alone. I am only new to TP and have found it a great help talking with everyone. Please keep posting and help will find you.

Take Care


Registered User
Aug 12, 2007
hi and welcome to tp

my wife (52) was finally diagnosed earlier this year, after 2/3 years of confusion, and responds in much the same way as your husband.

sadly, all the old hobbies have gone out the window as they present too much of a problem. These days all she seems to want to do is watch movies as even being involved in a conversation with more than a couple of people leaves her confused and blank.

i'm so sorry you've had to find yourself joining us on this bleak journey but rest assured tp is here and even if i don't post all that much, i find comfort in sharing this site.


Registered User
Sep 21, 2005
hello emma joe, so sorry you have had to join our club, but it has bee my life line for last few years, so any help you need just ask away, because i have recieved more help from this forum than any of the professionals, ( mind you i am lucky in having great cpn & consultant) As to finding things to occupy your husband, this was my greatest mistake, i felt i had to find something to fill all those hours, my husband was very active all ways up to something, so i tried everything imaginable, painting, magnetic toys lego. all total waste of time, but Trev did not wish to do anything, it was me wanting him to, iI have learnt to just let him be. He constantly moves furniture and i find my belongings in most unbelivable places. which though very irratating at the time really does no harm, learnt also cannot have showhome house any longer just live with the chaios,and have stopped apologising to others it is Trevs home afterall. The 1 thing trv enjoys is music and tapping out a beat and we often put on a rolling stones videio and have a great time having an uninhibited dance session. So i think it best to let analzhiemers sufferer lead the way and not feel you are failing them by not providing stimulation , just thought this might help, it may be different with you and your husband, but i havc decided not to beat myse,lf up and just go with the flow ,take care and keep posting Pam


Registered User
Apr 26, 2006
Emma Joe. When Jean was diagnosed about 5 years ago she used to be very well up on word games like Scrabble etc and extremely interested in music.

After a couple of years she had visits from from the Community Mental health outreach workers and they started her on painting by numbers. She took to it like a duck to water. Gradually though that faded as well but the music interest has stayed.

Perhaps a change in activity may help.


Registered User
Apr 26, 2006
any one out there

dear emma jo
unfortunatly we are out there
i wish we were not
bob my hubby is now 60 has not worked for 3 years re dementia
he also gets very confused like yours
i have been lucky just lately getting him intrested in model car and motor bike making kits
but it is hard and my heart goes out to you bob also will not go to local meetings
get it out of your system any time tp is full of lovelly caring people who know how we feel
love bel x


Registered User
Jun 6, 2007
Hello Emma Jo,

My husband was diagnosed 2 years ago at 53, but I believe that it started quite a few years earlier. Sadly I can't offer any advise on how to keep your husband occupied as I haven't found any ways. All I can say is that we try to involve him as much as possible. We have 2 children (7 & 9). Friends have been amazing and often take him out for a drink/meal.

Take care of you.