1. Our next Q&A session is on the topic of Christmas and dementia.This time we want our Q&A to involve our resident experts, you! Share tips and advice on navigating Christmas here in this thread.

    Pop by and post your questions or if you prefer you can email your question to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.
  1. manArgentina

    manArgentina Registered User

    Aug 10, 2019
    42
    Male
    Mendoza, Argentina
    Im just getting insane, as always. Ive not have a talk in so much time. A 1 on 1 talk, online or in real. Im just used to this, but so much time without have a talk with someone, its like this everyday, just making conversations in my mind, imagining Im talking with someone, checking my email to see if someone have replied one my many messages i post in all the depression forums and groups ive posted, but 0 replies. Imagining what i would talk with someone about the strange situations i have to deal with my mother.

    If this against the rules of the forum sorry, I send a message to a mod but didnt have a reply.
     
  2. karaokePete

    karaokePete Registered User

    Jul 23, 2017
    5,022
    N Ireland
    Hello @manArgentina, that feeling of being alone in this world of dementia caring is well known to me and I'm sure it's the same for all the carers who make up the membership of the forum.

    The forum is not just about giving information, it's about mutual support at this difficult time in our lives.

    Please feel free to 'talk' here if it helps to combat the feelings of isolation. I'm sure you will get support from fellow forum members.

    I wish you and your mother the very best.:)
     
  3. Rosserk

    Rosserk Registered User

    Jul 9, 2019
    341
    Hello @manArgentina! Welcome to the forum. I’m pretty new here myself but I’ve posted lots of questions and I’ve always got a quick response from someone and the advice is always brilliant!
    You are absolutely right it can be so lonely being a carer. I’m surrounded by people but I feel very alone. The sadness and isolation I feel is all consuming and feels like it’s never going to end. Most days I feel like I’ve reached the end of the road and can’t keep going but somehow I manage.
    Please keep posting there are so many wonderful people with so much experience I don’t think I could cope without this site!

    Why don’t you start with your story and tell people a bit about your circumstances?

    Sending you big hugs
     
  4. Philbo

    Philbo Registered User

    Feb 28, 2017
    715
    Male
    Kent
    Hello @manArgentina

    Caring for someone with dementia can be an isolating experience and as @Rosserk says, you can be surrounded by people, yet still feel alone.

    After caring for my wife for 6 years at home, she recently went into full time residential care in a nursing home. Coming home to an empty house after 48 years of marriage is proving very hard to adapt to but I am somehow coping.

    Please keep on posting - doing so has helped keep my sane during the long "journey" so I hope you will find the same comfort from chatting with us all.

    Phil
     
  5. DesperateofDevon

    DesperateofDevon Registered User

    Jul 7, 2019
    1,900
    Hello , I couldn’t just read your post & run. It’s so easy to become isolated with caring for a PWD in any form. I can’t promise sensible conversation via the forum from myself - I bumble through my days barely functioning at times. Often feel like I’m living in an alternate reality, that occasionally coincides with others.

    Take care you aren’t alone in this experience, this forum is a good place to vent & get support.
     
  6. love.dad.but..

    love.dad.but.. Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    4,442
    Kent
    Dementia can be so isolating for the carer but there is always a listening ear on TP.

    Noticing where you are, the world is a small place. My daughter is away travelling and spent a couple of months recently working her way through central and South America. She had a lovely stay in Mendoza and enjoyed meeting many Argentinians before moving onto New Zealand.

    Keep posting.
     
  7. myss

    myss Registered User

    Jan 14, 2018
    384
    Hi @manArgentina I so agree with Rosserk's sentiments - I care for my dad with other members of my family and sometimes also feel lonely. Sometimes we talk about the dementia et al and that alone is sad, sometimes I'm having a difficult time with my dad and just wish the illness would just progress to its fullness so that he is no longer existing in this awful way, and of course that's a sad way to think of things too.

    The effect of dementia is much greater than perceived and others here can appreciate how you may be feeling after reading your post. Please make your thoughts know here - you'll get responses.
     
  8. Dimpsy

    Dimpsy Registered User

    Sep 2, 2019
    597
    Female
    Hello @manArgentina, there are millions of people like us around the world, caring for a loved one who is suffering from dementia, so in that respect, you are not alone.

    To be able to make contact online with people who are facing the same problems as yourself is a real comfort, knowing that at any time of the day or night, someone, somewhere, will be sharing your worries and passing on advice.

    As well as online 'conversations', you also need to have face-to-face contact with people in your area, otherwise you will feel very lonely and isolated.

    Are you able to access any groups that you could join with your mum.

    In Britain, we have Memory Cafes that cater for people with dementia and their carers, and they offer the opportunity for people to get together and have a cup of tea (and usually cake) as well as fun activities and day's out.
    Maybe you could search online (Google?) for any voluntary agencies that operate near to where you live, or ask at your GP surgery for help in contacting groups.

    If there aren't any support groups near to where you live - start one yourself!

    I am sure there are other carers that live near you and if you can get to know them, you will feel better in yourself knowing that you have helped other people to feel not so lonely.

    Perhaps you can start an Argenentinan Memory Cafe and organise regular meetings?

    Keep in touch with this forum and try not to feel sad.
     

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