Any tips

tmo

Registered User
Oct 4, 2015
7
0
My mum has taken to waking my dad or myself or both of us up at 3am to talk about her medication or show us her poo. Needless to say it's not helping our state of mind given our increasing tiredness and it's definitely not very nice, or very sanitary, thing to wake up to.

So I ask the collective minds here on TP, any hints, tips or tricks for having mum sleep through the night or at the very least distract her from her current faecal obsession?
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,356
0
Kent
I do sympathise but really have no advice to offer other than try a warm milky drink before bedtime to encourage a more restful night.

Most carers here on Talking Point will be able to relate to your broken nights and you have an additional disturbance to deal with which is most unpleasant.

Have you discussed the possibility of a mild sedative with your mother`s GP. Our GP refused to prescribe them for my husband but I have read on the foum of prescriptions being issued for sleep disturbance.
 

learningcurve

Registered User
Oct 9, 2015
22
0
69
Hampshire
My Mum used to wake us up at all times during the night. Then one night she was complaining of a pain so I gave her a couple of paracetamol and she slept through until around 9 am. I spoke to her doctor who said it would be ok if I tried one paracetamol every night. It worked, and she never woke us again in the night, in fact if she had to go to the loo in the night she would just go and then straight back to bed and back to sleep. Now she is in a care home they have continued to give it to her and she sleeps well. It would be well worth speaking to her doctor to see if you can try that with your Mum, it made a huge difference to us.
 

tmo

Registered User
Oct 4, 2015
7
0
Thank you, I'll try the warm milk drink and go talk to her doctor about the paracetamol / sleeping pills / mild sedatives.

I did consider that it may be a recurring body clock thing from before I moved in and changed her sleeping habits, I don't think dad bothered to wake her if she fell asleep early as I've noticed she does start snoring at around 8pm.

Anyway counting from an 8pm sleep time 3am would be a perfect 7 hours sleep, so if her body clock was a little messed up that that it would make sense. Now that I'm living with them she's not normally sleeping until 10 or 11pm (sometimes later) as I tend to wake her and she will tell me that she wasn't asleep really, she's very good at denying everything :p

I thought that maybe it would settle down because her body clock would change if I could keep her awake in the evenings for a month or so to tire her into sleeping through whilst finding a sleep pattern that is a little more reasonable for the rest of the family, especially me who's trying to find a job after moving here to help as her carer. It did seem to be working, we had several months of uninterrupted sleep, but unfortunately it seems to be getting worse again recently, she's back to waking up at 3am and waking us up the only difference being that she now promptly falls back asleep leaving us groggily awake and unable to settle back down properly as we have to deal with the other unpleasantness. Dad's taken to napping during the day to make up for lost sleep, and even I've found myself drifting off at times (looking after mum must be harder than I though as little to no sleep never seemed to bother me when I was living alone and working full time in England).

From both your responses though it sounds like this is a common occurrence with people who have dementia. Maybe the doctors will allow for sleeping pills to help give her a more settled night at least on a temporary basis...and thus provide the rest of the family some respite too. I can't really be drifting off once I finally find a job or I won't keep it long and that would be terrible as it's not the greatest job market out here.

I feel a little guilty because it's making me ratty which means I'm not keeping my frustrations in check as much as I would like to do and that's upsetting mum.
 

learningcurve

Registered User
Oct 9, 2015
22
0
69
Hampshire
Just to add, Mum's doctor prescribed sleeping tablets at one stage but they had the opposite effect. We gave her one and it seemed to make her hyperactive, she was awake all night and all the next day. She was obviously tired, she looked very sleepy and was slurring her words but for some reason she would not sleep. We would guide her back to bed but a couple of minutes after I left the room she was up again, this went on all night. She fell twice in the 24 hours after she had taken them. Needless to say I never gave her any more.
 

fizzie

Registered User
Jul 20, 2011
2,725
0
My Mum also had 2 paracetamol in the late evening and v rarely got up during the night!!
 

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