Any tips for Bedtime, please??

[JackyS]

Hello,
Mum is in a care home now and quite settled, but the friend she made when she first went there had a massive stroke about 6 weeks ago and is unlikely to be returning to the Home.
It's really thrown Mum and she's reverted to one of the habits she got into before she went into the Home. She doesn't really know night from day. So, after her tea (usually around 5:30ish) she's going back to her room, getting undressed and then going to bed. She then wakes later in the evening, thinks it's morning and gets dressed again.
The Care Home are clearly struggling to know how to help her. They called me to ask if I thought them writing a bed time on her calendar might help. It might - but she's recently stopped reading her calendar I think (used to be her "bible" and she still takes it everywhere with her).
Anyone got any bright ideas, please?

 

[Jessbow]

Care home need to distract her, surely? As she goes to trot off after tea, ask her to go and do something/sit by so and so and have chat/anything to distract & change the routine

 

[Saffie]

I agree that some sort of change to the structure of the evening after the meal needs putting into place. Perhaps music played in your mother's bedroom when it IS time to go to bed or as, suggested, a distraction at the time she is disappearing into her room.
Hopefully, the same thing every evening so a routine is established.

 

[JackyS]

Hmmmm, do you both think this is the care home not doing their job very well? (or maybe not having enough staff to look after everyone properly ??)

 

[Saffie]

I'm not sure Jacky. Staffing is always a problem in Dave's home but that is because it's a nursing home and a lot people on his wing are in need of hoisting for everything and of course, that takes 2 carers away every time. They start putting these people back to bed soon after lunch as a number are only allowed up for a few hours, Dave included. It would obviously be different in a residential home where people are more-or less mobile.

I'm just thinking of what seems like a possible common-sense thing to do - and in a way, what you do for young children. If you want someone not to go to bed before it is time, you give them something else to interest them until it is time then establish a routine for bedtime! Perhaps a special DVD if the carers are too busy to be hands on. I hope they can find a solution.

 

[stanleypj]

Hmmmm, do you both think this is the care home not doing their job very well? (or maybe not having enough staff to look after everyone properly ??)

Surely the very fact that they asked you suggests this. I suppose it's possible that you might have had some kind of secret solution but I would guess that anything that might have worked 'at home' would not be much use in the care home where there would be so many differences.