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any suggestions on volunteers/visitors during the day when my husband and I are out at work

fee1974

New member
May 20, 2021
2
0
Hi,

I have just joined this forum as my mother in law, who is 87 and lives with me and my husband has been diagnosed. We have seen her memory deteriorate and some quite child-like behaviour appear, which I have to say is quite sad to see.

I also feel guilty that although we notified the DVLA about her diagnosis, I wrote to them separately to say I didn't;t think she should be driving. She is still independent and she only drives up the road, but I am very worried that her reaction times are no where near what they were. I feel like I have betrayed her trust.

I'm certain I have done the right thing, but it doesn't help. I am also sure that this is probably not the last difficult decision we will need to make on her behalf.

I want to do what's best to help her and protect her as much as I can.

I would also be interested to hear if anyone has any suggestions on volunteers/visitors during the day when my husband and I are out at work. I have no idea what is available to help her and support us whilst she is still independent enough to live at home. Any thoughts/advise gratefully received.
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,233
0
Hi @fee1974 and welcome to Dementia Talking Point, you'll get lots of support and advice here.
I think getting things in place to support your mother in law early is a good idea. I guess she is still fine at managing personal care making food while you are out etc.
This site has lots of links to different sorts of support and would be a good place to start. AgeUk also have a service that provides help at home in some areas. They don't do personal care but they could provide someone to go shopping with your mother in law or to chat to her at home and do a bit of light housework.
 

fee1974

New member
May 20, 2021
2
0
Thank you. She is fine with personal care. it's more for company as she has slowly withdrawn from any social interactions. She has no idea what she has eaten each day so I try and work it out from what's missing in the fridge. I try and cook for her when I can but she doesn't like to eat when we do as it's quite a bit later in the evening.
Ill have a look at AGE UK website to see what they have available as well.
 

ianchanning

New member
Jun 10, 2021
2
0
Hi @fee1974 and welcome to Dementia Talking Point, you'll get lots of support and advice here.
I think getting things in place to support your mother in law early is a good idea. I guess she is still fine at managing personal care making food while you are out etc.
This site has lots of links to different sorts of support and would be a good place to start. AgeUk also have a service that provides help at home in some areas. They don't do personal care but they could provide someone to go shopping with your mother in law or to chat to her at home and do a bit of light housework.
Thanks for this - the Age UK link was very helpful
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
15,346
0
South coast
What about day care?
They offer social interaction, they will keep her safe and will also offer a meal mid-day.