Hi, I haven't posted for quite a while but visit the site regularly. My mother, sort of diagnosed two years ago with dementia, who is now nearly 89 years old, is still living alone. The latest problem is that she is barely eating anything. She now refuses to eat meat, vegetables or anything else healthy. She has never liked milk or eggs which cuts the options down quite a bit. I cook her meals and then just throw them away. She is losing weight and her clothes just hang on her. Her lack of diet is making her constipated, which compounds the problem that she doesn't want to eat. She just lives on croissants when I am not there and roast potatoes when am I there. I have spoken to her doctor, who gave me a prescription for fortified drinks but she can't live on those. She will not entertain meals on wheels or anyone else going into the house. I was in two minds as to whether to take her to the hospital tonight as she was in such pain with the constipation. Has anyone else out there had to deal with this problem, would be grateful for any advice on how to deal with this.
Any ideas or advice?
- Thread starter lilykins
- Start date
Hi Lilykins,
It's hard to force someone to eat when they don't want to. I'd have been over the moon if my mum would have eaten croissants or roast potatoes! Admittedly it's not very nutritious, which is where the protein drinks come in to supplement a poor diet.
Do try to keep your mum eating for as long as possible, even if it's nutritionally poor. Every little helps.
Re the constipation, have you tried your mum on Movicol? You can get it on prescription and we had mum on one a day when her constipation was bad. When it got beyond a joke, the DN would come in and give her an enema which is something you could consider.
Sorry this isn't a particularly helpful reply, but not eating properly seems to be a feature of dementia.
Good luck
Vonny xx
It's hard to force someone to eat when they don't want to. I'd have been over the moon if my mum would have eaten croissants or roast potatoes! Admittedly it's not very nutritious, which is where the protein drinks come in to supplement a poor diet.
Do try to keep your mum eating for as long as possible, even if it's nutritionally poor. Every little helps.
Re the constipation, have you tried your mum on Movicol? You can get it on prescription and we had mum on one a day when her constipation was bad. When it got beyond a joke, the DN would come in and give her an enema which is something you could consider.
Sorry this isn't a particularly helpful reply, but not eating properly seems to be a feature of dementia.
Good luck
Vonny xx
Hi lilykins,
As Vonny has already said, much of your post echoes other people's experiences of caring for someone in the latter stages of dementia.
There are some factsheets on the main Alzheimer's website that might not offer you anything new, but should at least help you put the current situation in perspective:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/511
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?categoryID=200208&documentID=364
If your mum is in a great deal of pain from constipation I would see if you can get a home visit from your GP or district nurse or even try NHS Direct tonight.
Take care,
As Vonny has already said, much of your post echoes other people's experiences of caring for someone in the latter stages of dementia.
There are some factsheets on the main Alzheimer's website that might not offer you anything new, but should at least help you put the current situation in perspective:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/511
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?categoryID=200208&documentID=364
If your mum is in a great deal of pain from constipation I would see if you can get a home visit from your GP or district nurse or even try NHS Direct tonight.
Take care,
We found these things useful:
Don't fret over eating "rubbish". As Vonny says be grateful if anything goes in. Coax and cajole is often the only way.
Good Luck
- Fortisip drinks (taste better chilled)Try to get two a day inside for nutrition and to keep up energy levels
- Little bowls of grapes and chopped up fruit to hand to eat like sweeties.
- Fibre supplements (as drinks)
- Try to get her to drink more water
Don't fret over eating "rubbish". As Vonny says be grateful if anything goes in. Coax and cajole is often the only way.
Good Luck
Eating and drinking
Hello
This is very interesting. My 93 year old spinster aunt is in the later stages, not now eating or drinking, even anything in front of her. We are just starting to try meals on wheels, but I can't see her eating them. Her 2 twin sisters, aged 82, are very upset about this, it is interesting that I can tell them it is normal, though very upsetting. She is also incontinent, bladder, we thought that may be why she did not want to drink.
Brenda
Hello
This is very interesting. My 93 year old spinster aunt is in the later stages, not now eating or drinking, even anything in front of her. We are just starting to try meals on wheels, but I can't see her eating them. Her 2 twin sisters, aged 82, are very upset about this, it is interesting that I can tell them it is normal, though very upsetting. She is also incontinent, bladder, we thought that may be why she did not want to drink.
Brenda
Hi
Am afraid 2 say that all this is quite common esp in late stage or when they have an infection.Movicol has been a godsend 4 mum, it's not a laxative it carries extra fluid in2 the bowel so softens things.
as others have said don't worry bout good nutrition, give what they will eat and u may have 2 puree it,getting fluids in can be a prob, it's hard with my mum at times. then something like Thick & easy comes in2 its own ,it can be used in hot or cold drinks and food,it's tasteless. available on prescription or buy at chemist. Mum has extremely runny porridge every morning I add 3 scoop of it ,its a good way of getting some extra hidden fluid in. hope this helps
Am afraid 2 say that all this is quite common esp in late stage or when they have an infection.Movicol has been a godsend 4 mum, it's not a laxative it carries extra fluid in2 the bowel so softens things.
as others have said don't worry bout good nutrition, give what they will eat and u may have 2 puree it,getting fluids in can be a prob, it's hard with my mum at times. then something like Thick & easy comes in2 its own ,it can be used in hot or cold drinks and food,it's tasteless. available on prescription or buy at chemist. Mum has extremely runny porridge every morning I add 3 scoop of it ,its a good way of getting some extra hidden fluid in. hope this helps
just thought of something else,if they not keen on those drinks providing they have a sweet tooth, u could try Resource dessert energy,its like a ready made pot of custard comes in 3 favours mum chocolate flavour not 2 good tho. available on prescription
hello lilykins, we find movicol, and a warm drink and kiwi fruit seems to do the trick, i just pop something in trevs mouth when ever i pass by, fruit, sweets, , is mum able to feed herself, or does she just not have an appetite any more, hope things,get sorted for her,love pam
My mum (who always loved her food!) is also now not eating much and the home are having to puree some of her meals. She will however quite happily sit on a night and eat chocolates and soft jellies. I think probably the taste of food diminishes over time as well as the physical problem of actually chewing and swallowing which doesn't help. You could try a bowl of soft prunes or apricots as well as the other suggestions just to get something into her.
Some ideas.
My dad had fortisips. You can get the equivalent in powder form, and add to soups, casseroles, desserts, drinks.
A soup made with lentils and fortisips powder is nutritious,stick a cheese dumpling on top. Try to add a bit of very thinly cut chicken. So thin she doesn't notice it. So she likes roast potatoes, sprinkle grated cheese on + fortisips.
She doesn't like milk. How about custard? A fruit trifle (with fortisips), cereal bars, baked apple with raisins inside, and cream (with fortisips).
I once had constipation. Just the once, the proper thing. I had been ill and bedbound for about a week. The pain was indescribable, absolutely. I screamed on emptying my bowels. Prunes are the answer. Prune juice. Prunes and custard (with fortisips).
Easy to eat things, scrambled egg (with fortisips) - I am getting boring now! Pobs. Wot? I here you all say. Milk (oh mum doesn't like milk - okay water and fortisips), grated cheese and pieces of soft potatato, like a soup. Bread to dunk in? Even bread already in it.
Hope some of it helps.
Still going. What about tasty fish like sardines or pilchards? Mashed up on toast. Lots of nutrition in them.
Margaret
My dad had fortisips. You can get the equivalent in powder form, and add to soups, casseroles, desserts, drinks.
A soup made with lentils and fortisips powder is nutritious,stick a cheese dumpling on top. Try to add a bit of very thinly cut chicken. So thin she doesn't notice it. So she likes roast potatoes, sprinkle grated cheese on + fortisips.
She doesn't like milk. How about custard? A fruit trifle (with fortisips), cereal bars, baked apple with raisins inside, and cream (with fortisips).
I once had constipation. Just the once, the proper thing. I had been ill and bedbound for about a week. The pain was indescribable, absolutely. I screamed on emptying my bowels. Prunes are the answer. Prune juice. Prunes and custard (with fortisips).
Easy to eat things, scrambled egg (with fortisips) - I am getting boring now! Pobs. Wot? I here you all say. Milk (oh mum doesn't like milk - okay water and fortisips), grated cheese and pieces of soft potatato, like a soup. Bread to dunk in? Even bread already in it.
Hope some of it helps.
Still going. What about tasty fish like sardines or pilchards? Mashed up on toast. Lots of nutrition in them.
Margaret
Hi
This is my first reply,food is a issue for my mother who now lives with me,in October she was nine and a half stone now she is seven stone eleven.I found she was not eating or taking her tablets,when I questioned her she replied she just was not bothered with food.We found that when she lived with us she was saying no thank you I am not hungry,so we sat her at the table when we had our meals and placed a small meal in front of her, now she joins in as she sees this as normal.She does not eat a lot,I guess the brain was just telling her not to bother before,this may not work for everyone ,but just a idea.The several stages of dementia are frustrating and I feel I am still learning lots.
This is my first reply,food is a issue for my mother who now lives with me,in October she was nine and a half stone now she is seven stone eleven.I found she was not eating or taking her tablets,when I questioned her she replied she just was not bothered with food.We found that when she lived with us she was saying no thank you I am not hungry,so we sat her at the table when we had our meals and placed a small meal in front of her, now she joins in as she sees this as normal.She does not eat a lot,I guess the brain was just telling her not to bother before,this may not work for everyone ,but just a idea.The several stages of dementia are frustrating and I feel I am still learning lots.
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We had a dietician visit for my FIL who was losing weight due to his emphysema - she was more concerned with my MIL when she arrived. Food has been an issue with my MIL for quite a while - and she is increasingly frail although tells anyone who will listen that she is "fat enough thank you!" Its almost as if she is anorexic.
Anyway - one thing the dietician did suggest was adding powdered milk (such as "marvel") to everything you can think off - now they have gravy with added marvel, creamed potatoes with added marvel - and I also open the milk, add 3 or 4 spoons of marvel to it, and hey ho!! Hidden calories!!
Its worth a try!
Cheers,
Tracey xx
Anyway - one thing the dietician did suggest was adding powdered milk (such as "marvel") to everything you can think off - now they have gravy with added marvel, creamed potatoes with added marvel - and I also open the milk, add 3 or 4 spoons of marvel to it, and hey ho!! Hidden calories!!
Its worth a try!
Cheers,
Tracey xx
The Marvel is a great idea for calories. The Fortisips stuff has other vitamins and minerals - and the power stuff is like Marvel.
Love
MArgaret
Love
MArgaret
I had a similar situation, and received lots of helpful suggestions here ... http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/showthread.php?t=12032
Thanks everyone for the advice. I had managed to get my mother back to eating one meal a day (not always particularly nutritious). However she was taken into hospital two weeks ago with a UTI, hates hospital food (don't we all) and now to top it all there is norovirus on the ward. She was due to go into a care home last Monday, but no-one is being discharged from the hospital until further notice.
Lilykins
Lilykins
