I received another call tonight from Carer ( Friday ) as dad wouldn't take his bedtime medication or go to bed apparently he told her he needed a ambulance and was waiting for one to arrive.
I know fellow forum followers are saying I should withdraw as it will help to accelerate dad getting the help he needs as in 24/7 care but its so difficult and I suppose I viewed the call tonight as more important than dad perhaps refusing his lunch or afternoon tea.
I told carer to just leave dad and lock up and I would go to him to assist him to bed. I just wanted to get dad to his bed tonight and try and deal with the rest tomorrow.
Dad had been found sitting in the dark in his lounge on bedtime carers arrival.
As some of you are aware dads mixed dementia has got worse carers are struggling and Crisis Team were called in recently but to be honest I'm very disappointed with their response.
Having put dad on Risperidone it was removed after a few days due to dad becoming shaky and a bit unstable on his feet complaining of pains in his legs etc. Its now been agreed dad will not be going back on it.
I was told Crisis Team were going to see how dads Carers were dealing with him but this would only be for 2-3 of their visits. On the first visit they arranged they turned up after the carer had actually left. Next visit I was at dads home as had been visiting him when his GP called the house and asked if he could come straight away to see dad and give him his flu injection so I was still there when dads carer arrived which I hadn't intended to be. The Crisis lady literally turned up seconds after dads GP left and as the carer was there for afternoon call and GP had already done dads blood pressure etc she decided against coming in so as not to agitate dad any further.
GP was expecting me to stay to let him in and obviously convey how he felt dad was otherwise I would have left the carer to see to dad as we have been advised to. The GP was concerned about dad stability and stairs.
My sister emailed this afternoon dad had got angry with the lunch carer shouted at her and she had to leave so sister having received a call from Care Company Office said she would go round and do him some lunch. I know it sounds hypocritical in light of my going tonight to ensure he got to bed but I do disagree with sister doing this as I feel this is delaying dad getting a placement in Residential Care.
The lady from Crisis Team had called sister today ( Friday ) and said she had been in to see dad on Thursday afternoon after his lunch lady had been and said dad seemed quite happy, she had asked dad how he found his carers and he had said they needed to be more respectful to him but hadn't explained what he meant. Lady asked my sister what she felt he might have meant and sister says dad doesn't like the personnel care she then asked if dad was perhaps offered a towel in order to cover himself a bit but dad does wear pads and soils himself regularly as he has no bowel control at all and does wear a catheter which does entail emptying and additional night bag removing every morning. I can imagine if dad was asked to hold a towel to cover his modesty it would make their job more difficult and probably give him something to aim at them when he's agitated and aggressive. Dad won't bath or shower. I know the carers are probably a bit mixed in how they deal with dad but don't believe any are unkind.
It seemed to me that some blame is being aimed at dads carers and Crisis Team lady has suggested we contact the Care Company and speak to them about how the carers are dealing with dad perhaps query how they greet him on arrival etc and if they can draw up a chart for the carers to see if there is a pattern to dads moods/behaviour.
I think its obvious there is a pattern already mornings is a struggle for carers as it involves his washing and dressing, lunch is becoming a struggle as dad most days refuses lunch which in turn means he's refusing catheter being emptied and pad check and then gets angry because he gets fed up 'everyone wanting to feed him' by afternoon he's hungry but thinks its breakfast time but they offer either a sandwich or tea and cake as meals offered in the past at that time were refused. By late afternoon dad is now starting to want to go to bed thinking its bedtime and no one is there to put him to bed. I know this will get worse as the night draws in.
Dad has been being monitored for some time by Care Company so quite honestly I believe the Care Company as does sister are reaching the end of the line for providing their care to dad and are awaiting as we are for someone to override dads wish to stay in his own home.
According to Crisis Team dad still has capacity to refuse Respite or Residential care.
On my arrival at dads around 9.45 pm he was in his lounge carer had put a light on he was a bit agitated saying he has had a Heart Attack ( says it frequently now ) and is waiting for an ambulance. I managed to reassure dad a bit and he took his medication it was just a Simvastin at bedtime. I helped dad upstairs changed pad which fortunately wasn't too bad emptied his day catheter bag and helped him into Pjs dad won't brush his teeth at night. I attached the night bag and put his CD on with headphones whilst I tidied his clothes. Dad drank a full beaker of water which initially was always in the room should he get thirsty at night but dad believes he has to drink the lot now. Dad said I had done everything perfectly forgetting that I had in the past been going in every other morning so was familiar with the catheter.
I will ring the Crisis Team in morning to update them as sister says that their part in dads care comes to a end after the weekend.
Sister was told they will be in touch with ASC on Monday and we should get a call from them regarding next course of action.
I know its been indicated by Care Company and ASC that everything available has to be tried first given dads reluctance to go into a CH and the fact that in their opinion dad still has capacity to say no is not making things easy.
I know fellow forum followers are saying I should withdraw as it will help to accelerate dad getting the help he needs as in 24/7 care but its so difficult and I suppose I viewed the call tonight as more important than dad perhaps refusing his lunch or afternoon tea.
I told carer to just leave dad and lock up and I would go to him to assist him to bed. I just wanted to get dad to his bed tonight and try and deal with the rest tomorrow.
Dad had been found sitting in the dark in his lounge on bedtime carers arrival.
As some of you are aware dads mixed dementia has got worse carers are struggling and Crisis Team were called in recently but to be honest I'm very disappointed with their response.
Having put dad on Risperidone it was removed after a few days due to dad becoming shaky and a bit unstable on his feet complaining of pains in his legs etc. Its now been agreed dad will not be going back on it.
I was told Crisis Team were going to see how dads Carers were dealing with him but this would only be for 2-3 of their visits. On the first visit they arranged they turned up after the carer had actually left. Next visit I was at dads home as had been visiting him when his GP called the house and asked if he could come straight away to see dad and give him his flu injection so I was still there when dads carer arrived which I hadn't intended to be. The Crisis lady literally turned up seconds after dads GP left and as the carer was there for afternoon call and GP had already done dads blood pressure etc she decided against coming in so as not to agitate dad any further.
GP was expecting me to stay to let him in and obviously convey how he felt dad was otherwise I would have left the carer to see to dad as we have been advised to. The GP was concerned about dad stability and stairs.
My sister emailed this afternoon dad had got angry with the lunch carer shouted at her and she had to leave so sister having received a call from Care Company Office said she would go round and do him some lunch. I know it sounds hypocritical in light of my going tonight to ensure he got to bed but I do disagree with sister doing this as I feel this is delaying dad getting a placement in Residential Care.
The lady from Crisis Team had called sister today ( Friday ) and said she had been in to see dad on Thursday afternoon after his lunch lady had been and said dad seemed quite happy, she had asked dad how he found his carers and he had said they needed to be more respectful to him but hadn't explained what he meant. Lady asked my sister what she felt he might have meant and sister says dad doesn't like the personnel care she then asked if dad was perhaps offered a towel in order to cover himself a bit but dad does wear pads and soils himself regularly as he has no bowel control at all and does wear a catheter which does entail emptying and additional night bag removing every morning. I can imagine if dad was asked to hold a towel to cover his modesty it would make their job more difficult and probably give him something to aim at them when he's agitated and aggressive. Dad won't bath or shower. I know the carers are probably a bit mixed in how they deal with dad but don't believe any are unkind.
It seemed to me that some blame is being aimed at dads carers and Crisis Team lady has suggested we contact the Care Company and speak to them about how the carers are dealing with dad perhaps query how they greet him on arrival etc and if they can draw up a chart for the carers to see if there is a pattern to dads moods/behaviour.
I think its obvious there is a pattern already mornings is a struggle for carers as it involves his washing and dressing, lunch is becoming a struggle as dad most days refuses lunch which in turn means he's refusing catheter being emptied and pad check and then gets angry because he gets fed up 'everyone wanting to feed him' by afternoon he's hungry but thinks its breakfast time but they offer either a sandwich or tea and cake as meals offered in the past at that time were refused. By late afternoon dad is now starting to want to go to bed thinking its bedtime and no one is there to put him to bed. I know this will get worse as the night draws in.
Dad has been being monitored for some time by Care Company so quite honestly I believe the Care Company as does sister are reaching the end of the line for providing their care to dad and are awaiting as we are for someone to override dads wish to stay in his own home.
According to Crisis Team dad still has capacity to refuse Respite or Residential care.
On my arrival at dads around 9.45 pm he was in his lounge carer had put a light on he was a bit agitated saying he has had a Heart Attack ( says it frequently now ) and is waiting for an ambulance. I managed to reassure dad a bit and he took his medication it was just a Simvastin at bedtime. I helped dad upstairs changed pad which fortunately wasn't too bad emptied his day catheter bag and helped him into Pjs dad won't brush his teeth at night. I attached the night bag and put his CD on with headphones whilst I tidied his clothes. Dad drank a full beaker of water which initially was always in the room should he get thirsty at night but dad believes he has to drink the lot now. Dad said I had done everything perfectly forgetting that I had in the past been going in every other morning so was familiar with the catheter.
I will ring the Crisis Team in morning to update them as sister says that their part in dads care comes to a end after the weekend.
Sister was told they will be in touch with ASC on Monday and we should get a call from them regarding next course of action.
I know its been indicated by Care Company and ASC that everything available has to be tried first given dads reluctance to go into a CH and the fact that in their opinion dad still has capacity to say no is not making things easy.
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