I had a couple of days home between getting back and bringing him home in order to see my brother and his wife from Adelaide, Australia. I didn’t contact him or go to see him because I thought that might unsettle him as per other peoples experience. Our daughter took them to see him and he was very bright with them, me having given them tips on what to say and what not to say (thank you everyone on TP). He was waiting for me resting on his bed having packed his suitcase and WHAT a mess. Everything stuffed in higglety pigglety which I had to repack, starting to feel irritable but managed to calm myself. He had fished his dirty clothes out of the washing net and stuffed them in with the clean ones so I had to do a sniff test for the things that were not obviously dirty. Apparently he had been constantly packing up and the staff unpacking for several days. He showed his sundowning every evening the same as at home and altogether had exactly the same habits. They did get him moving and he socialised a bit. We had lunch together with the other residents and believe me I had to chat for a bit to determine if one lady was a resident or visitor but after a while she gave herself away, such a lovely lady who had clearly loved her garden. After lunch we had coffee in the sitting room and then he said he was going for a lie down on his bed and would see me again. I think he thought he was staying! So he must have been settled. The transition home has been very smooth so I would judge our experience of respite as a success. I had to really steel myself and keep pushing on to do this and it isn’t easy but vital for carers if it can be done. Your encouragement kept me going all you kind folks. I just hope this respite effect lasts a bit now. Back to the grind of the dementia world.