An honour and a giggle

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by di65, Jun 18, 2015.

  1. di65

    di65 Registered User

    Feb 28, 2013
    new zealand
    Lex has been a member of his Rotary Club since 1988, and was awarded a Paul Harris Fellowship a couple of years ago. Last night was his Club's annual Changeover, and I was invited along, as is the custom for partners of members. All was going well, until after the roll-call of the new committee. They then called me up to the top table and awarded Lex an honorary membership in recognition of his years of service. I even got a lovely bouquet of flowers! He would have been so proud of the award. I will tell him about it, but I doubt that he will take it in.
    I had a ring from the nurse at the Care Home this morning to tell me that there was an issue with Lex. Before panic could set in, she said - but it's not of his making. Apparently one of the female patients has taken a shine to him:D. He doesn't show any willingness on his behalf, but she follows him everywhere and tries to kiss him:eek:. I don't really know what to think, but smiled inwardly when the nurse said she has a history of doing this, and she is in her 90's :D. What a cougar:)
    They are keeping an eye on all the goings on, but I am pleased that they have noted it and have informed me. What a merry life he is living now.
  2. bemused1

    bemused1 Registered User

    Mar 4, 2012
    A lovely bit of recognition for you both. But the second part has lifted the start of my day with a smile. Let there be fun for people with dementia where they find it.
  3. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    Your hubby sounds a bit like mine with not being able to understand things. But at least you know, and the presentation did you good, Di. Lovely of the club members to do that for Lex :)

    We have a few capers at our CH, too. It's not an unusual thing to find people using others' beds for a kip or a rest, or for someone to blunder into a room when they feel like it. Have to take these things in our stride and not worry about them.

    Hope today is good for you :)
  4. starryuk

    starryuk Registered User

    Nov 8, 2012
    Congratulations Lex!

    It is good to hear that they haven't forgotten him.
  5. esmeralda

    esmeralda Registered User

    Nov 27, 2014
    What a lovely post!! You must have been very proud.
    The 90plus year old cougar made me smile. Glad Lex is exhibiting restraint though and obviously handling it with dignity:D:D:D
  6. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    That's lovely. You can keep that memory for him. You must be very proud that they honoured him.
  7. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    Well done Lex, on all counts. :)
  8. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    Lovely news!
  9. marmarlade

    marmarlade Registered User

    Jan 26, 2015
    my hubby has been in care for a few months and he to has a lady friend who kisses him and holds his hand. the staff have a hard time if for some reason they need to be parted, but on some of our visits hubby has informed us she wants a baby she is 80, hubby getting a bit worried about this, we told him to tell her to get a hamster instead this made him laugh, hubby says she goes to see him when they have been asked to go to bed. but when we see him we laugh with him about it and he finds it quite funny now, bless them they really do live in a different world but they are happy
  10. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    Lovely post Di - something for you to treasure, and so nice that they remembered your husband with such obvious respect and affection, even though he can no longer attend their gatherings.
  11. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    Toronto, Canada
    That was sensitive and understanding on the part of the Rotary Club, to honour and recognize Lex regardless of his current circumstances. Congratulations to him.

    I had to smile about his 90 year old cougar. We had a similar situation at my mother's nursing home but it was my husband who was propositioned by a 98 year old woman. She told him to "come to my room at 4 o'clock, drop your trousers and I'll show you a good time". Poor man didn't know where to put his face! Sympathetic me cackled like a loon. :D
  12. BR_ANA

    BR_ANA Registered User

    Jun 27, 2012
    My mother is/was the cougar. She had lots of boyfriends (bf) on 5 years of CH. It is weird that because before dementia she only had eyes my dad.

    I talked several times to CH manager that my mother can have bf but staff must control them so more looking and less touching - old fashion way. ( avoid falls and cross infections)

    I am sorry for any wife that could be hurt by my mother or any cougar in a CH. It is just dementia.
  13. di65

    di65 Registered User

    Feb 28, 2013
    new zealand
    Oh Briana - I am far from hurt, I know that it is just the illness talking, and admit to quite a few chuckles. However, I am chuffed that he is rejecting her advances - there must still be a little left of my influence on his life.
    He of course can't remember anything about it, and thinks I am nuts when I mention his 'girlfriend'.
    He seems to think he has only bee there for the afternoon, and has no idea that it has been just on seven weeks. He tells visitors that I have just popped out, but will be back soon and will make them a cuppa:)
  14. Isabella41

    Isabella41 Registered User

    Feb 20, 2012
    Northern Ireland
    There's a lady in mum's care home who is 'ahem' very amourous with any man she can get to. My poor husband was left very red faced the other week. Initially he thought she was harmless and let her stroke his hair. She then wandered off. As soon as he stood up she was back in a flash and thrust her hand somewhere rather delicate. His face was a picture and all I could do was giggle. This lady does have a husband who visits her regularly and I really feel for him as she behaves like this when he's there and you can see the distress on her face.

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