An amorous advance...

spandit

Registered User
Feb 11, 2020
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One of the carers was staying overnight with my father, who is generally quite placid, albeit stubborn. She was a bit shocked when he asked her for a kiss and tried to pull her on the bed as she was tucking him in. Fortunately, she's not the kind to get worried about it, although it is embarrassing (and with his Parkinson's, he wouldn't have had the coordination to do anything about it if he had been successful in his advances!). It's an improvement on last week when he threatened to have her killed, I suppose...
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
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Kent
Oh Dear! I wonder if your father thought the carer was your mother @spandit . The intimate action of tucking him into bed might have triggered memories.
 

MaNaAk

Registered User
Jun 19, 2016
11,884
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Essex
Unfortunately there were occasions when my dad said I could get into bed with him and there have been incidents where PWDs have thought that their daughters were their partners on this forum.

MaNaAk
 

maximillion4

New member
Sep 22, 2021
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As a care giver for my dad who has had early onset Alzheimers for 10 years now, I even have determined that there are magnificent engagement things to do for every stage. Now that my dad is inside the ultimate stages, i clearly like to use tactile things to do like fidget blankets and pillows collectively with him moreover to having him play with cars etc for car therapy. car remedy in Dementia can also be a excellent pastime for presenting pleasure and calm and that i have saw that my dad responds nicely doing . inside the early stages, coloring used to be the major favored exercise for my dad. One herbal tea that has really hellped him and calmed him down which i am amazed with because it carries him to present time zone more often is the lemon balm tea..Trust me i a surprised . i also rub a little of the lemon balm salve on his temples. .Hope this helps anyone xx
 
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DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
3,274
0
One of the carers was staying overnight with my father, who is generally quite placid, albeit stubborn. She was a bit shocked when he asked her for a kiss and tried to pull her on the bed as she was tucking him in. Fortunately, she's not the kind to get worried about it, although it is embarrassing (and with his Parkinson's, he wouldn't have had the coordination to do anything about it if he had been successful in his advances!). It's an improvement on last week when he threatened to have her killed, I suppose...
My Dad made a pass at me, my husband was present at the time!
So listening to live music in the care home I was holding Dads hand & tapping along to the music.
Dad leans across & asks “ when are we doing the rudes?”
Me: “ you what?”
Dad: “ you know the naughties…”
Me: “ see that man sat next to you ..”
Dad: “yes..”
Me: ( laughing) ”…that’s my husband. I don’t do the rudes/ naughties with him so certainly won’t be doing it with you. But nice try “
yes I laughed , yes I made light of it as in Dads head he was in his early twenties & a bit of a lad !
It meant nothing, just reality & inhibitions distorted by dementia.

I got Dad a big cuddly toy , & did the same for Mum. Mum kisses & cuddles it continually & it brings comfort , company.

Your Dad won’t remember , & the carer needs to be aware of this aspect of dementia & how to deal with it. It’s really common.
 

spandit

Registered User
Feb 11, 2020
348
0
You are right, he doesn't remember. The carer thought it was quite funny, I think, although she was a bit taken aback. He's had a reasonable day today, as it goes...
 

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