1. floss3

    floss3 Registered User

    Jan 3, 2014
    2
    Worthing, West Sussex
    My husband was diagnosis September 2013,i have found hard to cope with the problems .Iam 67 years old my husband is 71yrs.My life has changed ,i seem to get angry nearly every day at all the mistakes he makes durring a day , ijust find it so hard to cope most days.
     
  2. 3shirley

    3shirley Registered User

    Nov 28, 2013
    20
    workington
    My husband is 65 im 56 he was diagnosed 2010 but had it a while before just like you i found it hard to cope but now i have found imformation on the alzimers web site very helpful and goes along way helping me learn how to cope with the care neil needs and gives me an understanding of this awful illness

    Sent from my GT-P5110 using Talking Point mobile app
     
  3. floss3

    floss3 Registered User

    Jan 3, 2014
    2
    Worthing, West Sussex
    Alzheimers

    Thankyou for your reply iknow i will be getting some help this year once people get back to work .Thankyou once again ,i just feel so tired.
     
  4. geordie

    geordie Registered User

    May 11, 2010
    108
    my situation is different - mother and daughter and M was thankfully much older when she met with this disease. Our journey has been ongoing for about 10 years.
    Just wanted to share a comment a support worker used a while ago which I found really helpful. We were going through some rather traumatic behaviour issues - he said - 'it's a season' and so it was - that problem passed - and others took it's place. I feel for you at this early stage - I spent many hours crying - but living with the disease has change me quite dramatically too - I hope for the better - more accepting of what the issues are at the moment - take it day by day - my experience is that there are many lovely moments to experience - just grab and cherish them.
    Best wishes
     
  5. velo70

    velo70 Registered User

    Sep 20, 2012
    177
    Devon
    Hi floss3

    Really hard to cope isn't it? Especially when your OH has been so vibrant in previous years. I think the anger is at what the effect is having on your fella. I have learned to roll with it, and though I would like to do something, I have had to teach myself to just let it go by recognising the importance of the thing causing the upset. It seems we have to aspire to a saintly tolerance, which is probably kinder to the sufferer and the carer. It doesn't help when a pro tells me 'it doesn't get better than this'. We try to start each day as day 1 here we go. Some days are almost normal; But my irritation with it all only adds stress to my lovely pal. All I can do is sympathise with everyone in our position. Regards.
     
  6. velo70

    velo70 Registered User

    Sep 20, 2012
    177
    Devon
    Floss3

    One on here, aka grannie g pointed me to some info that was most helpful. I'm sure she will be around somewhere over the next few hours.
     
  7. Don't feel bad. It's verging on impossible to not be infuriated by all the frustrations that come along with dementia. Nobody is perfect, and everyone gets frustrated and loses their cool.

    There does seem to be a lot of pressure on the carer to be perfect and calm, and patient, and tolerant. That, just isn't some of us (me included). I'm not like that as a mother, and I'm sure I wouldn't be that as a carer.

    You are doing the best you can, and it is not an easy job to be a carer.
     
  8. FifiMo

    FifiMo Registered User

    Feb 10, 2010
    4,710
    Wiltshire
    Hiya Floss,

    You might find the following thread useful in how to communicate with your husband and also to understand how things are from his point of view.

    http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/show...ionate-Communication-with-the-Memory-Impaired

    It is difficult for us to understand the changes that are happening and it does sound like a cliche when folks say 'it's the illness'. If you want to share with us some examples of the mistakes that send you in to orbit, we could possibly share suggestions or coping mechanisms with you. I doubt there is anything going on that someone on here hasn't encountered and we are all willing to share experiences on here, especially if they can help someone else.

    Fiona
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.