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Alcohol amnesia

Bunpoots

Volunteer Host
Apr 1, 2016
5,336
0
Nottinghamshire
My dad was sectioned after a stay in hospital when I refused to take him home as he wasn’t safe. I think you’d need his GP or some other medical professional to do the sectioning.

Is this to try to get him into rehab @Long journey ahead ?
 

Long journey ahead

Registered User
Mar 28, 2020
62
0
My dad was sectioned after a stay in hospital when I refused to take him home as he wasn’t safe. I think you’d need his GP or some other medical professional to do the sectioning.

Is this to try to get him into rehab @Long journey ahead ?
Hi bunpoot
Yes he needs a professional detox to help him but he can't see it.
I don't know how to get his gp to see he is unsafe.
He just keeps telling me he has capacity so able to make his own choices.
He clearly cant. He won't eat and he isn't taking care of his appearance. He has tried several times to cut down but it makes him so ill. He had to go into hospital last August but they just discharged him after intravenous pabrinex.
If he doesn't get help soon it will be too late.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
3,205
0
Southampton
the problem is that if they dont want to be helped then no-one can help them. with my son, they treated the anxiety which was being created or him self-medicating with the drink for. then they weaned him off it and with the help of his partner he gradually came down. before that he was on a course of self- destruction, in trouble all the time, no pride. its legal and freely available so how do they learn that it took whole swathes of his life over where he didnt remember where hed been. i dont think it is taking as seriously as smoking.
 

Long journey ahead

Registered User
Mar 28, 2020
62
0
the problem is that if they dont want to be helped then no-one can help them. with my son, they treated the anxiety which was being created or him self-medicating with the drink for. then they weaned him off it and with the help of his partner he gradually came down. before that he was on a course of self- destruction, in trouble all the time, no pride. its legal and freely available so how do they learn that it took whole swathes of his life over where he didnt remember where hed been. i dont think it is taking as seriously as smoking.
that's the problem it's freely available and if I don't buy it he will
I managed to get him down a little over a few months but he waited while I was in the bath and took the car out for more after drinking 12 bottles of strong lager
his family want him sectioned. I just don't know how I can do it
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
3,205
0
Southampton
if he did it again, you could call the police and say he was over the limit and took the car without consent. ive just googled the question and basically they need to be assessed as being a danger to themselves or others.im not sure how you would do it unless the family done it rather than you.
 

Long journey ahead

Registered User
Mar 28, 2020
62
0
Have you contacted Mind or Alcoholics Anonymous? I wonder if they might have some suggestions about how you could get help?
I have been referred for counselling with mind so I could ask them then.
It seems so frustrating watching your loved one deteriorate before you.
 

Bunpoots

Volunteer Host
Apr 1, 2016
5,336
0
Nottinghamshire
My dad passed away 2 years ago @Long journey ahead but he spent his last few weeks in a care home where he was well looked after. He died suddenly (as he wished) but would have stayed there until the end anyway (he was 90yrs old).

I hope you find a way of getting your OH the help he needs. For my dad sectioning while he was in hospital was what he needed but I did have to fight his corner, he said he wanted to go home but I knew he wasn’t safe and wasn’t prepared to let that happen and dad didn’t recognise his own home by this time.

Be prepared to dig your heels in!
 

Long journey ahead

Registered User
Mar 28, 2020
62
0
My dad passed away 2 years ago @Long journey ahead but he spent his last few weeks in a care home where he was well looked after. He died suddenly (as he wished) but would have stayed there until the end anyway (he was 90yrs old).

I hope you find a way of getting your OH the help he needs. For my dad sectioning while he was in hospital was what he needed but I did have to fight his corner, he said he wanted to go home but I knew he wasn’t safe and wasn’t prepared to let that happen and dad didn’t recognise his own home by this time.

Be prepared to dig your heels in!
Bless him. I am so sorry.
My OH is only 57 but seems to have given up on life.
Last year was a battle to try and get help for him made much harder with the pandemic. I am up for a battle if it means helping him understand that if he doesn't stop drinking he will become much worse or even die.
X
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
14,933
0
South coast
I am up for a battle if it means helping him understand that if he doesn't stop drinking he will become much worse or even die.
I am not sure that you would ever be able to explain to him that if he doesnt stop drinking he will get worse and maybe die. You are trying to use logic and reasoning which dementia doesnt do very well at all. He may not believe you, say he doesnt care, or perhaps agree in the moment, but then deny he ever said it. You may have to just do things and present it to him as a done deal.
 

TNJJ

Registered User
May 7, 2019
1,930
0
cornwall
I have an ex husband who is an alcoholic . It was a nightmare marriage especially when the children were young. I divorced him when the youngest was 6.
The thing I learnt is you cannot help someone who doesn’t want it. They have to want it..It sounds like he is not there .But I didn’t buy the alcohol for him(he usually went to the pub and then bought more home). He would never eat much. Now only weighs 7/12 stone. If the doctor says he has capacity there is not much you can do except wait for a crisis..You can only be responsible for your actions and responses . He his. Sorry if this is sounding harsh . It is not meant to.
 

Long journey ahead

Registered User
Mar 28, 2020
62
0
I have an ex husband who is an alcoholic . It was a nightmare marriage especially when the children were young. I divorced him when the youngest was 6.
The thing I learnt is you cannot help someone who doesn’t want it. They have to want it..It sounds like he is not there .But I didn’t buy the alcohol for him(he usually went to the pub and then bought more home). He would never eat much. Now only weighs 7/12 stone. If the doctor says he has capacity there is not much you can do except wait for a crisis..You can only be responsible for your actions and responses . He his. Sorry if this is sounding harsh . It is not meant to.
I agree I cannot control his actions.
I need his family to understand that too.
they put pressure on me to do something! I hope they will see in time. They ask me what do you but his beers?
it's hopeless and I know will not end well.
Just hope I can stay strong
 

Long journey ahead

Registered User
Mar 28, 2020
62
0
What a day yesterday trying to get him to the hospital for an ultrasound on his heart. Waiting game now for results. Checking for cardiomyopathy. Does anybody know the treatment for this condition please?
 

Weasell

Registered User
Oct 21, 2019
1,282
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