Aggressive behaviour

Mrs Ozz

Registered User
Apr 20, 2011
22
0
Lincoln
My husband has had Alzheimer’s for over 7 years and is now quite aggressive to me, but also he has started pee-ing anywhere and everywhere. It’s driving me insane!!! What can I do?
 

Amethyst59

Registered User
Jul 3, 2017
5,776
0
Kent

My husband has had Alzheimer’s for over 7 years and is now quite aggressive to me, but also he has started pee-ing anywhere and everywhere. It’s driving me insane!!! What can I do?
Hello, can you give a bit more detail? What support do you have currently?
I guess we all have our own ‘breaking point’, for me, violence would be a deal breaker. You must keep yourself safe.
As for peeing, I spent many nights following my husband to make sure he peed in the right place. Is it happening all day, or just when he is sleepy? We found leaving a light on in the bathroom and the lid up, bought us a few more months of care at home.
The aggressive behaviour is the worrying thing though ...please keep posting so that we can give more specific advice.
 

Mrs Ozz

Registered User
Apr 20, 2011
22
0
Lincoln


Hello, can you give a bit more detail? What support do you have currently?
I guess we all have our own ‘breaking point’, for me, violence would be a deal breaker. You must keep yourself safe.
As for peeing, I spent many nights following my husband to make sure he peed in the right place. Is it happening all day, or just when he is sleepy? We found leaving a light on in the bathroom and the lid up, bought us a few more months of care at home.
The aggressive behaviour is the worrying thing though ...please keep posting so that we can give more specific advice.
 

Mrs Ozz

Registered User
Apr 20, 2011
22
0
Lincoln
I don’t get any help at home but he goes into daycare twice a week. I’ve stopped going to Singing for the Brain and Activity days because he can sometimes be horrible. He’s only pushed me not actually hit me, and it’s my fault because I answer him back and I know I shouldn’t but I get so cross with him.
 

BMitchell

Registered User
Sep 28, 2017
10
0
I know that the most important advice I got was to build a plan around what is going to work to keep me calm.

You cannot control the person in your charge, but you can take care of yourself so that you have the patience to deal with any situation.

It is not about being selfish, it is about giving yourself enough space to deliver the people in your care what they need.

I hope that I am saying this clearly enough.

Best of luck.
 

Mrs Ozz

Registered User
Apr 20, 2011
22
0
Lincoln
I know that the most important advice I got was to build a plan around what is going to work to keep me calm.

You cannot control the person in your charge, but you can take care of yourself so that you have the patience to deal with any situation.

It is not about being selfish, it is about giving yourself enough space to deliver the people in your care what they need.

I hope that I am saying this clearly enough.

Best of luck.
Thank you.....I know what you are saying but it’s so,so hard to carry these things out. I was coping so well but things just seem to have gone off track a little!! I’ll get back on track soon, just feeling a bit down in the dumps.
 

karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,534
0
N Ireland
My husband has had Alzheimer’s for over 7 years and is now quite aggressive to me, but also he has started pee-ing anywhere and everywhere. It’s driving me insane!!! What can I do?
Hello Mrs Ozz, I see you have already been given some advice on your problem but I wonder if you have seen the very comprehensive AS Factsheet about the continence issue. In case you haven't, and in the hope that it will help, here's a link that will take you to it https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/sites...factsheet_continence_and_using_the_toilet.pdf

If your husband is pushing when he is having these continence issues embarrassment may be the cause, especially if, in his confusion, he doesn't recognise you or that you are trying to help in the heat of the moment. In that case, strange as it may sound, introducing yourself and saying what you are trying to do may help.