1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. Jennie Leech

    Jennie Leech Registered User

    Feb 3, 2004
    9
    Suffolk
    My husband is considered `aggressive` by his carers in certain circumstances .. when they take away his walking sticks, wash and bath him, change his pads and put him to bed.
    I think they are misusing the word `aggressive`and he is only showing need to remain independent but that's a different issue. Any hints as to what we can do to make him less `aggressive`?
    Jennie
     
  2. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hi Jennie

    Imagine - you believe you are normal, and probably that everyone around you is behaving strangely. With no control over circumstance, you find yourself left in a strange place. You are still you, to yourself, and may be wondering when things will get back to normal.

    Then, something you know well, and rely upon - your walking stick - is taken away by someone. Or you are led to a bathroom and a stranger [perhaps a strange woman, if you are a man; perhaps a strange man, if you are a woman; perhaps several strangers] starts to undress you and wash you. Or something even more personal, the pads.

    You perhaps can't communicate very well by speech. You can't walk out - no stick. How can you show you are not happy or that you don't understand what is going on? You try and stop them, or resist. This is thought of as aggression.

    What is the answer? To be truthful, there may not be one for everyone, but I have found that talking quite normally and naturally to them [ie not as if the are children or idiots] can make all sorts of situation easier, if not actually easy.
     
  3. SLS

    SLS Registered User

    Feb 20, 2004
    4
    Lancashire
    Hi Jennie
    I had a similar problem with my Mum. The nursing home said she was becoming "aggressive" which is very out of character for her.
    I think what was actually happening is that my Mum was stating her independance. My Mum would stay up late and not go to bed when everyone else did, she started being 'stubborn'.
    It must be hard for people to go from living in their own home to being told what time to eat & go to bed etc, by someone else(even if they are suffering from Alzheimers).
    It must be hard being 'told' what to do rather than being 'asked' what you want to do. Maybe if you try & talk to your husband and get him to suggest a certain day he would like his baths, then it becomes partly 'his' decision.

    Keep smiling!

    SLS
     
  4. kate34

    kate34 Registered User

    Sep 23, 2003
    51
    dad getting aggressive and violent

    Dad has become increasingly aggressive and violent over the past week or so in the home. He seemed to settle well, but is going through this patch at the moment, my question is, does this happen commonly with Alzheimer's Disease?
     

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