Hi everyone
My Mum's sister in law died last Friday (not the nicest return from 3 days break, much appreciated, in Cornwall, but as she was over 90 and very frail, it didn't come as a shock).
Her daughter left me a voicemail message (yet to reply, as thrown into work turmoil on return here, and left office at 10 last night: does the opportunity to feel guilty never end?), and said she would understand if I chose not to tell Mum for a while in case it would upset her. The funeral is on Friday, and I just know that taking Mum - if it were possible - would mean taking her within a few miles of her house, and the on-going "I want to go home" (which is simply not going away as an issue - she's writing to old friends and neighbours trying to get them to come and get her) would just escalate.
Any advice, wisdom or words of comfort would be appreciated. It seems to be that the easiest course of action is not to mention it for a while, so the funeral issue doesn't get the opportunity to raise it's head. Time for some more little white lies? (I didn't find out because it happened while I was away ...)
I'm beginning to feel like I'm having to live in an alternative reality myself just to make hers more bearable.
Dave
My Mum's sister in law died last Friday (not the nicest return from 3 days break, much appreciated, in Cornwall, but as she was over 90 and very frail, it didn't come as a shock).
Her daughter left me a voicemail message (yet to reply, as thrown into work turmoil on return here, and left office at 10 last night: does the opportunity to feel guilty never end?), and said she would understand if I chose not to tell Mum for a while in case it would upset her. The funeral is on Friday, and I just know that taking Mum - if it were possible - would mean taking her within a few miles of her house, and the on-going "I want to go home" (which is simply not going away as an issue - she's writing to old friends and neighbours trying to get them to come and get her) would just escalate.
Any advice, wisdom or words of comfort would be appreciated. It seems to be that the easiest course of action is not to mention it for a while, so the funeral issue doesn't get the opportunity to raise it's head. Time for some more little white lies? (I didn't find out because it happened while I was away ...)
I'm beginning to feel like I'm having to live in an alternative reality myself just to make hers more bearable.
Dave