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Advice Please

ACR

Registered User
Apr 4, 2015
4
I have just joined the forum, I think my Dad might be entering his late stage of dementia, he is incontinent quite regularly these days, usually during the night. He has episodes of jerkiness and is getting more sleepy. He also suffers from epilepsy and so occasionally has really bad fits which seem to take him down a level each time but he doesn't seem to have recovered that well from his last fit over a week ago now. All of his symptoms, word finding, reasoning, mobility and daily functions are deteriorating. Can anyone tell me if he's now in late stage dementia? He's still living with Mum in sheltered accommodation and neither of them want him to go into care, its heartbreaking.
 

jan.s

Registered User
Sep 20, 2011
7,353
68
I am sorry to hear about your Dad. It is so awful watching the deterioration. Have you had an assessment done by Social Services to assess their needs. It may well be that a carer coming in would help both of them, taking some of the responsibility from your mum.

I find it hard to quantify when mid stage ends and later stage starts. I tend to accept where my husband is and work from there.

I hope this helps.
 

ACR

Registered User
Apr 4, 2015
4
I am sorry to hear about your Dad. It is so awful watching the deterioration. Have you had an assessment done by Social Services to assess their needs. It may well be that a carer coming in would help both of them, taking some of the responsibility from your mum.

I find it hard to quantify when mid stage ends and later stage starts. I tend to accept where my husband is and work from there.

I hope this helps.
Yes they have carers going in morning and evening to prompt medication as Mum's memory is poor also. They have just been re-assessed and are now going to get help with Dads personal care in the mornings. Mum has been really reluctant to accept this though. I'm just hoping that this is a dip that Dad is going to come out of, but wondering whether its deterioration that isn't going to get better. Thanks for your response.
 

jaymor

Volunteer Moderator
Jul 14, 2006
13,009
England
Hello ACR and welcome to Talking Point.

So sorry to hear about your Dad and the problems he is experiencing. He may well be in he late stages of dementia but that does not mean that he is at the end of his life.

Like Jans I find it difficult to define each stage and to be honest I don't try. We are where we are and we deal with the ups and downs as they happen. Last June my husband had several infections and became seriously ill. He was put on end of life care with everything put into place. August he started to improve though he is not back to where he was and is now immobile, he is out of bed and in his chair and taking an interest at what goes on around him.

No two people live with dementia in the same way, some deteriate quickly some live really well for years.
 

ACR

Registered User
Apr 4, 2015
4
Hello ACR and welcome to Talking Point.

So sorry to hear about your Dad and the problems he is experiencing. He may well be in he late stages of dementia but that does not mean that he is at the end of his life.

Like Jans I find it difficult to define each stage and to be honest I don't try. We are where we are and we deal with the ups and downs as they happen. Last June my husband had several infections and became seriously ill. He was put on end of life care with everything put into place. August he started to improve though he is not back to where he was and is now immobile, he is out of bed and in his chair and taking an interest at what goes on around him.

No two people live with dementia in the same way, some deteriate quickly some live really well for years.
Thanks for your response, I suppose I'm wondering whether Dad's other problems will make him deteriorate more quickly, he has atrial fibrillation, epilepsy and asthma also so has a lot to cope with. I guess we just have to take each day as it comes.
 

ACR

Registered User
Apr 4, 2015
4
Thanks for your response, I suppose I'm wondering whether Dad's other problems will make him deteriorate more quickly, he has atrial fibrillation, epilepsy and asthma also so has a lot to cope with. I guess we just have to take each day as it comes.
Turns out he has a chest infection, and in a weird way I'm so relieved, hopefully with a course of antibiotics he should pick up again :)