Not that it helps much but my Mum initially had Butrans patches - they didn't help her pain much. Fentanyl was much better but it now has a reputation for overuse and addiction so doctors may be reluctant to give it. She also had oral morphine as
@Jaded'n'faded mentioned (Oramorph) when things were really bad. You probably don't want to go down that route.
I think that's right as others have said, it's so badly inflamed you need to let it rest for a period. You could try putting the new one on the top of your arm but I expect you are scared of a possible skin reaction.
It must be absolute hell for you. I hope the patch you had on continues to work for a while. Don't do anything strenuous - can your husband put the shopping away?