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i feel really sorry for you @margherita hes now awake but not jumping up and down. the shopping will be here in a minute so he has to help me carrying it through.I wish my husband were sleeping all day instead of pestering me and breathing under my neck.It would be a godsend.
thank you @MaNaAk i felt like i had been arguing with myself all night but bit was more solid and better quality. hes just dozing as he has to carry the shopping through soonThis is exactly what I say and you may have slept better because of the break. We do such a difficult job and I remember how it is.
thanks @canary, hes awake watching racing cars going round, formula 1, he woke up again coughing and breathless. he keeps saying the air is better and he can breathe better down there. there is an answer to that.I guess he is worn out after all the "Hosting" yesterday
If OH has a day out it always takes him a couple of days to recover.
Enjoy the peace while you can
thank you @canary the gp said about frontal lobe as well. its a pain when you have to wait for doctors to phone back@jennifer1967 - your husband has obviously got frontal lobe damage from the dementia and this is the bit of the brain that controls the emotions. He literally cannot control his temper, because all the filters that make people hold their tongue and/or swallow their emotions are fried. Whatever comes into his head has to be expressed because he has no way of supressing it now. Add to this that he can no longer see anybodies view apart from his own. So, he wants something, he cannot see why you cant do it, he is annoyed and has nothing to supress these feelings.
So, you see, he cant do anything about it, anymore than my mum could do anything about the way she kept forgetting things. The damage just shows up in a different way with your husband. It doesnt mean you have to put up with his aggression, though. There is medication that can help and I hope you can get help soon,
no @MaNaAk, he erupted and shouted but he was also very short of breath as well which added to his frustration. i had to sit him down and calm him down so he could get his breath back. when he started shouting as soon as he walked through the door, i withdrew mentally. hes on steroids which always makes him more on edge. his breathlessness makes him agitated. the damp in the air doesnt help. he scared me but being the carer kicked in.
thank you @Grannie G i remember and have written some down. sometimes its just for a split second and other times is more extended. im more careful about flashpoints but not careful enough yesterday.
hello @Glynis1950, my husband had a thing about grabbing/ groping every time time i had to pass him to get out of the living room door. he actually hurt to be honest and instinctly i told him no and not to do it. i sleep in a separate room to him but do have all the suggestive comments like im a piece of meat. id say, let him be sulky and depressed and dont feel guilty. just because you are married, you still have the right to say no. go to the other room and maybe this will break the pattern he is in. let him get on with his anger and just walk away to another space and do something else. dont argue as he will just dig his heels in. mine still does it sometimes but not half as much as he used to. phone the gp and see if there is anything they can do.Hi - this must be really hard for you. My husband has vascular dementia and he too can be very demanding, but his demands are sexual. I find this difficult to manage because if I refuse he becomes very sulky and depressed which leaves me feeling guilty. I am at my wits end with this and last night thought about going to another room. This morning I am feeling his anger with me. Does any one have any advice on this?
lady from SALT phoned about his swallowing. she told me moist things and hes on the waiting to be seen probably video call but he can do that. shes sending some fact sheets what to avoid and what to encourage. he does the cooking so he will have to either let me do it[kitchen is his empire] or do it himself properly.the gp has phoned and is referring to the SALT team although they arent seeing anyone at the moment. he has to have soft food which is fine but there is a sticking point is cornish pasties. he comes from devon and cornish pasties are mandatory. he thinks he can take off the pastry, doesw anyone have ideas? gravy?