Advice please.

[Kentish lady]

My husband has the chance of going to a Hospice for a course for Dementia sufferers ,once a week for 8 weeks for 5 hours. He is frightened to go anywhere on his own. How can I handle this? I would like him to go. He spends so long just sitting in his chair watching our dog or looking out of the window. He is 69 and I think he would enjoy the company. I cant really spend 5 hours waiting at the Hospice in case he needs me. He might decide that he is going home. I think if I stayed for a while , I might be able to pop out and then go back to pick him up .Should I book him a place and try it out.

 

[marionq]

Always give things a try. If it doesn’t work first time then try again later. There is nothing to lose when his life is so limited. It will be a new experience for you too just to be separated for a few hours.

 

[Grannie G]

You could stay with him for a short while on the first visit and hope the people running the course will have enough experience to give him the confidence to let you go.

I would certainly try. You have nothing to lose and a lot to gain.

 

[Lawson58]

My husband has the chance of going to a Hospice for a course for Dementia sufferers ,once a week for 8 weeks for 5 hours. He is frightened to go anywhere on his own. How can I handle this? I would like him to go. He spends so long just sitting in his chair watching our dog or looking out of the window. He is 69 and I think he would enjoy the company. I cant really spend 5 hours waiting at the Hospice in case he needs me. He might decide that he is going home. I think if I stayed for a while , I might be able to pop out and then go back to pick him up .Should I book him a place and try it out.

I should think that the professionals who are going to run the course would know how to deal with anxious dementia patients. Why not hang around outside for a while, have a coffee and see how it goes. I am a great believer in the old saying about nothing ventured, nothing gained.

You don't have a thing to lose. Just think what you could do with a few hours to yourself.

 

[nae sporran]

First time my partner went to day centre / lunch club they let me stay with her for two hours. That gave me time to assess the place and a chance to say I had seen it and liked the people which reassured her. Not sure if you will have the same chance, but try it once while staying close by, and see how your husband settles in. Good luck, @Kentish lady.

 

[Philbo]

My husband has the chance of going to a Hospice for a course for Dementia sufferers ,once a week for 8 weeks for 5 hours. He is frightened to go anywhere on his own. How can I handle this? I would like him to go. He spends so long just sitting in his chair watching our dog or looking out of the window. He is 69 and I think he would enjoy the company. I cant really spend 5 hours waiting at the Hospice in case he needs me. He might decide that he is going home. I think if I stayed for a while , I might be able to pop out and then go back to pick him up .Should I book him a place and try it out.

Hi

I would definitely try it and as others have said, the hospice will almost certainly be used to coping with all scenarios?

Although I never had such problems getting my wife to the day centre, I initially found it hard to leave her there - she looked so vulnerable. Even now she is in a nursing home, I find it emotional leaving her after each visit. I usually say that I will see her in a bit - just popping to the shop.

We are both (just) 69 and her dementia is at the fairly advanced stage (6+ years) so it is so sad to see the decline at a relatively young age.

I hope you get on okay and your husband is happy attending the course.

Best wishes
Phil (Man-of-Kent)

 

[Kentish lady]

My husband has the chance of going to a Hospice for a course for Dementia sufferers ,once a week for 8 weeks for 5 hours. He is frightened to go anywhere on his own. How can I handle this? I would like him to go. He spends so long just sitting in his chair watching our dog or looking out of the window. He is 69 and I think he would enjoy the company. I cant really spend 5 hours waiting at the Hospice in case he needs me. He might decide that he is going home. I think if I stayed for a while , I might be able to pop out and then go back to pick him up .Should I book him a place and try it out.

Yes give it a try. I went with my O H to something that sounds similar and although It was difficult to even get him to go ( we were always late, and usually arrived as the group were going to have lunch ) we had a great time. I explained that he did not want to stay without me and they said that I could stay with him. I was the only one , the others dropped off there L O 's and had about 5hours free time to do what they wanted and they loved that ! I am so glad we went , I laughed so much and had a great time ,the people running It were great . They did talks for carers and we were offered various treatments ,I had a foot massage , It was wonderful and all free. The 'patients' were entertained , they had games , they had a tour of the gardens , singing, table games, and had someone with them at all times. I highly recommend it , they understand that everyone Is different and has different needs and they are happy to adapt to help.

 

[canary]

Hello @Kentish lady - you are actually replying to your own thread from back in 2019!
Its good to hear an update that although you were worried about it beforehand, you tried it and found it helpful.