Good evening
Just a quick note to say thank you to everyone who has replied. It is good to know that there is a mountain of experience and advice out there that I can call on.
I would just like to provide some more information. There was a concern raised over dad's medication. I am personally responsible for all of dad's regular medication. I collect it each month from the GP and then load weekly dosset boxes for him. Currently, I think that it is under control.( these tablets are not for Altzheimers just other ongoing medical conditions) I have bought some easy to use boxes which have one compartment per day with the day of the week written on top. When I ring, I remind dad which day of the week it is and ask him to empty out that section of his dosset. Then, I ask him to tell me what his tablets look like(that way, I can make sure he has the correct ones), then I ask him to pour a glass of water and take them. As dad does not remember to take his tablets, I am not worried that he will take another dose because he just won't remember. I have also pinned a note on the kitchen wall to remind him that I am dealing with all his tablets and to ring me if he has any problems (my number is a preset on his phone).
Interesting that a couple of people have said that dad's GP needs to refer him to a specialist. The doctor has said to dad about having his memory assessed, but he denied that there was any problem. How can I get dad checked if he refuses. During a private phone call with dad's GP, she has agreed that dad "is not himself" even though during our joint visit to the doctor he managed to "walk the walk and talk the talk" making me out to be a liar! Has anyone else been in the same situation and how did you overcome it?
I am very concious that it has taken dad many years to "allow me" to help him with certain things. As I am his only carer the last thing I want to do is upset him so that the barriers come down and he states "just leave me alone, I will manage fine on my own".
One of the main reasons for taking dad to the doctors this week was because we(myself, husband and 2 kids) are planning to go on holiday for 3 weeks in the summer. I am aware that I also need to spend quality time with my young family as well as looking after dad. In order for me to enjoy my holiday, I need to have "someone" in to dad's each day to remind about tablets and sort out any other problems. I thought that SS would help but they have said "no". As dad has not been diagnoised with AD or short term memory loss then they will not send in a carer. This situation is impossible, dad won't agree to be assessed and until he has been SS won't help. Dad has already said to me that he would be happy to have a carer each day whilst I am away in France, "if hat would make me happy".
The whole situation is really frustrating, I feel as though I am walking with one foot nailed to the floor. Is there anything that I could do privately i.e pay for a carer.
Hope to hear from you.