Advice on care in the home.

[Biddledeboo]

Hi my dad lives with my mother and brother.
He has what they say mild vascular dementia, and keeps suffering with pneumonia and keeps getting hospitalised for it. On Xmas eve he started with loss of control of his bowls and it was admitted in hospital and is still there.
My question is what is the best way I can get help for my mam?my mam can’t cope with the incontinence it’s too difficult for her to manage. Ideally she would like someone to shower him and maybe take him out?
She gets no help with benefits etc.

thank you

 

[Maytree]

Hi my dad lives with my mother and brother.
He has what they say mild vascular dementia, and keeps suffering with pneumonia and keeps getting hospitalised for it. On Xmas eve he started with loss of control of his bowls and it was admitted in hospital and is still there.
My question is what is the best way I can get help for my mam?my mam can’t cope with the incontinence it’s too difficult for her to manage. Ideally she would like someone to shower him and maybe take him out?
She gets no help with benefits etc.

thank you

Have a word on the ward,if they are looking at discharging him,you should mention all of this to them, a lot of wards have a discharge coordinator and you can then discuss it with them, they might look at the potential help you could get

 

[canary]

Hello @Biddledeboo and welcome to DTP

Assuming that you live in UK there are various people to contact who can help
1 - Age UK or Citizens Advice can help with working out what benefits your parents can claim. I would think that your dad would be eligible for Attendance Allowance, if nothing else. They can also help with filling in the forms which are so long and repetitive that it can make you lose the will to live.

2 - Ask your dads GP for a referral to the local incontinence clinic where they can advise of how to deal with the bowel incontinence and supply pads/pull-ups etc

3 - Also ask your GP to refer your dad to Social Services for an assessment. In some places you can contact them yourself, but not all. Do not worry about Social Services involvement - many people seem to think that Social Services will take over and cart their charge off to a care home, whereas the reality is almost the exact opposite. They will do an assessment and can offer things like carers going in to shower and dress your dad and also offer day car, which will give your mum a break.

Edit to say that I missed the fact that he is still in hospital. Yes, there will be a SW in the hospital who can sort out a care package of carers going in day care, but they are unlikely to sort out benefits and you may still to ask the GP for referral to the incontinance clinic - so follow my points 1 and 2

 

[nae sporran]

Welcome to DTP @Biddledeboo.
Your mum should be entitled to a carers assessment and your dad to a care needs assessment. Your dad should also be entitled to attendance allowance if he is a pensioner. Social SErvices can advise and help with all of those. Hospital Social Worker started the ball rolling for my partner and I when she was in hospital 6 years ago, it has to be worth asking, as canary suggests.

 

[Biddledeboo]

Thank you all for your replies it’s been helpful.
I’ve not been today but my mam said they’ve moved him into a ward now and he was very confused.
I think they are doing delirium and OT assessment tomorrow.
I think my sister is gonna ring his doctors to try and sort test out.
Hopefully tomorrow is a better day for him.

thank you x