Hi Tixeross
I am with the others in that you should visit as many homes as possible. We did have one described to us by the SW as very lively, and I thought "ooh that sounds good", but when we visited it was like death row. Nothing lively at all.
The Inspection Reports make chilling reading at times, but you've got to read them thoroughly to see where they fall down. The one we chose fell down on decor, quite badly. Bedrooms were shabby, communal rooms were shabby, and this was June 2007. We visited in July and wondered if the Inspector had been to the wrong home! Surely in a month they could not have turned the place around so much?
We were shown three vacant bedrooms (or was it four?). Two were very small, and one felt rather chilly, the final one was a lovely bright sunny room. All were pleasantly decorated (perhaps a coat of paint needed in a couple of years), but certainly not shabby. Anyway, most of our rellies would probably not notice what is shabby - mum remarked on how nice my dining room was when she came last Christmas, and the wallpaper was peeling off the wall cos the plaster is falling off - and still is!
We were shown the dining room, a lovely room to eat in, sun streaming in through four large windows, tables beautifully set ready for the next meal, nice carpet, and told "this room is down for decorating shortly" (and is currently being done). The hallway was lovely, a few knocks on the walls where wheelchairs had probably collided with the wall, but that too has been decorated last month.
What the inspectors DON'T report on are the things that interest me. How often do residents get a bath? Is there a shower? (many homes don't have showers, ours is getting one in November). How are residents who wander at night supervised? What is the security level on the front door? (ours has none, despite mum being a wanderer, but after discussion with everyone we agreed she was not at risk of going out, and that has proved true). What are the arrangements for evacuation in the case of fire or other disaster?
The reports seem to focus on things that are less important to me (although some, like keeping records, are). Read the reports and use them as background only. A personal visit tells a lot more. One home we visited had very good reports (none have superb, don't expect it), yet despite three visits at different times, we only ever saw 25% of the residents in the communal rooms. Where were the rest? At the home we chose, 90% were visible and all dressed in day clothes. At one, most of the residents were still wearing night clothes in the afternoon. I didn't think that sort of atmosphere was right for my mum.
Don't accept someone else's report of a home, make your own choice. Her mum might not be like your mum.
We also added plus points to my mum's home cos they have an activities co-ordinator 5 afternoons a week, and mum has just started to join in, after 3 months of refusing to do so. On Tuesday, they all wrote a couple of paragraphs about themselves, who they were, their families etc. On Wednesday they played Snakes and Ladders and the play Bingo nearly every day. She does chair exercises (wrigling feet, stretching arms), they are now making Christmas cards. For Halloween, they made a skeleton, witches hats and broomsticks and carboard cats.
None of this goes into the Inspection reports.
Take care, choose the best you can for yourself and your dad. Good luck and keep us posted.
Lots of love at this difficult time. Been through it. Might have to go through it again at some time.
Margaret
