Hi, hope it's OK to post this - not sure if it's too specific?!
My mum was recently diagnosed. Sometimes she remembers the diagnosis, sometimes she doesn't. One big topic which makes her both upset and angry is about her bank card. She often loses it or hides it because she thinks someone will steal it, so my dad starting looking after it for her.
However, she becomes really angry at the thought of him keeping it and she believes he finds it in her secret hiding places and wants her to be without money. It's difficult because she was so independent and she gets angry at the thought of someone stopping her from keeping her own finances. If I was her I would be in completely the same mindset. However, with the situation as it is - she can't leave the house alone and she loses/hides things, to have a bank card which has money on the account isn't appropriate.
My sisters and I are unsure what to do. My dad likes to pretend everything is OK and mentions he doesn't want to burden us. We've suggested he takes all the money out of the account but he refuses to listen to us, thinking his way of managing it is fine. This is the main cause of distress for my mum and we have the same conversations a few times a week. I've tried to research into getting fake bank cards so she has a physical card she believes is hers but not had much luck.I will try going to the bank and asking what's possible too.
Does anyone have any other advice? Really interested to know if there is anyway we can remove/reduce the stress she feels as it's a horrible situation for all involved when she gets upset and/or angry.
Thanks!
My mum was recently diagnosed. Sometimes she remembers the diagnosis, sometimes she doesn't. One big topic which makes her both upset and angry is about her bank card. She often loses it or hides it because she thinks someone will steal it, so my dad starting looking after it for her.
However, she becomes really angry at the thought of him keeping it and she believes he finds it in her secret hiding places and wants her to be without money. It's difficult because she was so independent and she gets angry at the thought of someone stopping her from keeping her own finances. If I was her I would be in completely the same mindset. However, with the situation as it is - she can't leave the house alone and she loses/hides things, to have a bank card which has money on the account isn't appropriate.
My sisters and I are unsure what to do. My dad likes to pretend everything is OK and mentions he doesn't want to burden us. We've suggested he takes all the money out of the account but he refuses to listen to us, thinking his way of managing it is fine. This is the main cause of distress for my mum and we have the same conversations a few times a week. I've tried to research into getting fake bank cards so she has a physical card she believes is hers but not had much luck.I will try going to the bank and asking what's possible too.
Does anyone have any other advice? Really interested to know if there is anyway we can remove/reduce the stress she feels as it's a horrible situation for all involved when she gets upset and/or angry.
Thanks!