accused

[sleepingplum]

has anybody been accused of hurting the person they care for .my father in law had a fall this morning after tripping over the straps on his bed I think as he was led at the bottom of the bed and the straps were sticking out in the middle of the floor.i got him up dressed him checked him and gave him his breakfast when my husband came in he told us the girl had done but I am the only girl here he is in the latter stages of dementia

 

[Lavender45]

Sadly yes. A couple of months ago scratched her eyes on two separate occasion. The second time one of her friends asked how she did it and quick as a flash she said she did it pointing to me. Mum has back pain which is probably arthritis, but she's having some tests at the moment. The same friend asked what she had done to her shoulder and without turning a hair mum again said I did it. I hasten to add I've caused neither injury. I haven't fathomed out whether mum thought she was being funny or genuinely believed I'd hurt her. I shook my head to her friend each time, but I can imagine the concequences if mum said the same thing to her GP or a social worker!

 

[sleepingplum]

Sadly yes. A couple of months ago scratched her eyes on two separate occasion. The second time one of her friends asked how she did it and quick as a flash she said she did it pointing to me. Mum has back pain which is probably arthritis, but she's having some tests at the moment. The same friend asked what she had done to her shoulder and without turning a hair mum again said I did it. I hasten to add I've caused neither injury. I haven't fathomed out whether mum thought she was being funny or genuinely believed I'd hurt her. I shook my head to her friend each time, but I can imagine the concequences if mum said the same thing to her GP or a social worker!

thank you for your reply my fathers eye looks like he has been in a boxing ring I hasten to add I do not have the ability to cause such an injury I am no match to the double bed I'm afraid which I found him at the bottom of.i would be mortified if he said anything to anyone else. although he accused me of pushing him off a chair once and I was three miles away at the time

 

[Aisling]

has anybody been accused of hurting the person they care for .my father in law had a fall this morning after tripping over the straps on his bed I think as he was led at the bottom of the bed and the straps were sticking out in the middle of the floor.i got him up dressed him checked him and gave him his breakfast when my husband came in he told us the girl had done but I am the only girl here he is in the latter stages of dementia

Unfortunately this happens sleepingplum. More stress for carers. Eventually I got angry when people asked my OH what happened? It is such a pity that people for whatever reason don't seem to know how to relate to a person with AD. My OH told my sister that he hadn't seen me for months and he wanted to get rid of the women in the house!! It is so sad.

Virtual hugs,

Aisling xx

 

[Tin]

Happened to me today and it has not been the first time. While mopping bedroom floor and mum bending over close to me, her cheek/chin collided with the top of mop handle, bruising very quickly. Of course it was my fault and she told people we saw this morning that she had spoken to the police and they were coming to pick her up and take her to a safe place.

It is horrible when the finger is pointed at you as a carer, because when it comes to accidents like these, we are in a very vulnerable position.

 

[sleepingplum]

Happened to me today and it has not been the first time. While mopping bedroom floor and mum bending over close to me, her cheek/chin collided with the top of mop handle, bruising very quickly. Of course it was my fault and she told people we saw this morning that she had spoken to the police and they were coming to pick her up and take her to a safe place.

It is horrible when the finger is pointed at you as a carer, because when it comes to accidents like these, we are in a very vulnerable position.

thank you for your reply its good to know that I am not on my own in this.my OH went up later and he told him the nurse did it.it is extremely difficult what if he was due to see the doctor or the nurse it leaves me very vulnerable my self especially with all the stories on the tv lately.

 

[Bunpoots]

When my dad was caring for mum he was called into the office at the hospital and asked how mum got the fingerprint bruises on her arms. Anyone who's done a safeguarding course will know to look out for those as a sign of possible abuse. Dad was devastated to think he was being accused of hurting mum.

Fortunately one of the nurses asked dad to demonstrate how he lifted mum from her wheelchair. So he grabbed her arms... This was the cause of the bruising!! Mum bruised like a peach. No one had shown him the proper way to transfer in and out of a wheelchair and because of this social services were going to take mum away from him after 54 years of marriage!!

Thank goodness for that nurse!!

At least if you know where the bruises have come from you can argue your case. Mums bruises were faint and dad's eyesight not good! It was a very scary half hour!!!