Hi, It has been a couple of years since I last posted but I always look here at the posts and take a lot of comfort from the messages. Today has been a very difficult day and I just needed to share it ... To explain, my great aunt (88 now) has been in a nursing home for a couple of years now and today was the saddest day of those times. In recent weeks she has stopped eating and drinking and was briefly in hospital last week to be re-hydrated. A month ago she was able to smile and although she didn't have a clue who I was, she was able to speak. Two weeks ago she couldn't seem to understand anything I said and had been vomiting a lot despite not eating much. But today was the very saddest day because she had deteriorated further and seemed actually unable to understand what food is or how to eat/drink. I tried to feed her a yoghurt and there was absolutely no response from her whatsover - if she had spat it out at least it would have been a response. It just sat on her tongue - I tried everything to encourage her to lick, touch, swallow but nothing. I thought I was prepared and feel in my heart she has given up and is tired of life. The staff say she can be aggressive and refuse to eat or drink. I know she probably doesn't have long left but I got incredibly upset about seeing her so lifeless and unresponsive. I tried just stroking her hair and her hands and talking to her and there was nothing, no flicker of anything. She looked so haunted - she was breathing and her eyes moved a little but that was about it. Does anyone know - how long can someone survive on just fluids? And also, will she be in any pain at the moment? I had to phone my mum tonight and I there wasn't one positive thing I could say to her about the visit - no flicker of anything in my aunt's eyes. Thanks for reading - my mum has said if I don't want to go back and see my aunt I shouldn't feel duty bound ... but that's another thing I don't really know how to deal with. I keep thinking that if there's even the smallest flicker of response it's worth being there.