a moment of laughter.....

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by citybythesea, May 3, 2008.

  1. citybythesea

    citybythesea Registered User

    Mar 23, 2008
    632
    coast of texas
    today I have agonized over making a post...as most of you know mom is in her last stages. I do all I can for her comfort and one of those is to have a therapist come in twice a week. Basically all the therapist is doing is giving moms joints "massages" that help limber and loosen the tendons since they contract and over time that too can be painful when she is moved.

    Mom has not talked except 1 word at a time over the past few months. I always talk to her and we have company I tell her to say hi/bye..whatever 1 word I might get out of her.
    Well yesterday the therapist was working moms leg and hip and with the first movement you could see on her face pain. I told her tell her to stop. Mom said STop. It took both the therapist and me by surprise so she stopped for a moment then slowly started back up with her "massages".

    I know this sounds so trivial but to me is was like fresh air. I also wanted to let others know that even in the late stages those moments happen....tho they seem as important as the first step a baby makes.

    Don't get me wrong I know she will not get better...it's just nice to see a bright side sometime....Hugs to everyone.
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,884
    Kent
    It reminds me of my mother in her final stage.
    I had at long last been able to move her to a home of my choice. The Social Worker cam to check up on her. She asked her name. My mother replied.
    I hadn`t heard her voice for over a year.
     
  3. HelenMG

    HelenMG Registered User

    May 1, 2008
    194
    Dublin, Ireland
    Those moments of clarity are so heartwarming. Like a ray of sunshine.
    Big hug.
    Helen
     
  4. Nutty Nan

    Nutty Nan Registered User

    Nov 2, 2003
    787
    Buckinghamshire
    Thanks

    Your positive words linked to the expression 'final stage' are just what I needed to read tonight ............. tough times, when the rest of the world urges to 'give up', yet I am clinging to every little glimpse of what once was my lovely, strong husband.
    For better or worse. We've had lots of 'better'. Now is not the time to throw in the towel, even if it hurts like hell.:(
     
  5. BettyL

    BettyL Registered User

    Jan 20, 2008
    60
    Essex
    What a lovely and inspiring post. Thank you. I'm going through a bad phase at the moment and your words have made me feel better - and grateful.

    BettyL x
     
  6. May

    May Registered User

    Oct 15, 2005
    627
    Yorkshire
    Not trivial but very precious. I too have a Mum in final stage, she isn't 'with us' most of the time now. We talk to her,massage her, do her hair (that was always her favourite treat)cuddle her, occasionally she will smile at us. Yesterday my Dad put his head down on her shoulder 'for a cuddle', she lifted her hand and slowly stroked his hair just as she used to.....heartbreaking, but oh so very tender that tiny bit of communication.


    Nan I agree, it hurts, but we are storing these precious moments and glimpses of Mum against the dark days we know must come.

    Love to all
     

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