HI everyone Two CPNs visited my Aunt and Uncle on Friday. My Aunt couldn't answer any of the questions asked of her, constantly trying to use my Uncle as her brain. The one CPN took her outside so she could 'see the garden' while the other chatted to my Uncle who broke down completely to her. Well, the little ray of sunshine is that they have arranged for her to go for a scan on the 19th so I am SO RELIEVED that the ball is finally rolling. After months of trying to convince my Uncle she needs help something's happening!! Unfortunately she is now stating that she is NOT going to the hosapital, NO WAY. So, my Uncle has told her that he is going for the same test, just to get her there. My Brother and Sister in Law will be taking them and being on hand for moral support but i can't help feeling guilty that i won't be there for her. I have a 6 and a 4 year old, run my own business and i live 100 miles away so it isn't easy. I think i feel so guilty because I used to be so close to her. I lived with her from age 8 to 23, and stayed with them for weekends when i was even younger! As a child i used to tell her that if she ever died I wanted to die too! When i phone her it's like i'm talking to a completely different person. Everything i ask her gets relayed to my Uncle who gets ratty that she should be talking to me, not him. I have accepted that it's the illness and its not her fault and i'm also really worried about my Uncle. He's a very fit and active man (at 69 he goes out mountain biking with my hubby!) who can never sit still and still works, albeit part time. He now has to contend with the housework and meals and my Aunt following him around and using him as her brain. He seems very depressed at the moment and i only ever hear of them eating cheese on toast, or a sandwich and my aunt i think survives mainly on a couple of biscuits and cakes and cornettos. Neither of them have been big eaters but i wonder if my aunt's diet could be making her condition worse, i don't think they eat any veg and she has always been a vegetarian. While they were here over Christmas i made a cooked dinner every single day to try and get them adequately nourished before going home again and they practically licked the plates! One thing i started noticing about 2 years ago is that most of the food in their cupboards was out of date. When i visited i would point out to my uncle that some of it was weeks, months and even years out of date. He would get a bit shirty about it (now i know he was covering up for my Aunt) and every time i visited he would point out that everything was 'in date'. I now worry that between my visits they could be prone to eating food well past its sell by date. I remember once going to make a sandwich, took the ham out of the fridge to find it had grown fur!! yuck! Am i being too anxious about these things? Do a lot of people of that generation not bother so much about how olf their food is? I know my uncle has harped on about 'when rationing was around you couldn't be choosy' in the past. Sorry if i offend anyone with that statement, i don't mean to. I am just going round and round in circles worrying about the pair of them and losing a lot of sleep over it. Sorry for rambling on so much, this forum is wonderful for getting things of your chest isn't it?!