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A life in the day of.........................

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Grannie G, Jun 4, 2007.

  1. Helen33

    Helen33 Registered User

    Jul 20, 2008
    14,697
    Evening Sylvia

    Hopefully Dhiren will stay tucked up in bed, safe and warm, and when he comes round tomorrow he will be more recovered. My heart goes out to Alan when he's like that and all tucked up and warm and safe.

    Love
     
  2. AllyB

    AllyB Registered User

    Mar 22, 2009
    37
    Goodnight

    Goodnight everyone.

    allyb x
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,098
    Kent
    Hello Helen

    I`m going to be tucked up with him now. After a couple of bad nights I`ve taken something to help me sleep.
    So Goodnight Helen and Goodnight TP. xx
     
  4. heartbroken

    heartbroken Registered User

    Feb 17, 2008
    747
    derbyshire
    Hope you both have had a good night.
    Take care xx
     
  5. tillygirl

    tillygirl Registered User

    Jan 7, 2009
    211
    Tyneside
    Thinking of you Sylvia. I hope today is a good one.

    Take care Tilly
     
  6. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,098
    Kent
    Thank you Tilly and Lesley.

    We did have a good night but not a particularly good awakening.

    It began quite early, the usual questions about his pension and his money, but I realized, for the first time ever, the rationale behind the questions.

    Dhiren thinks he needs to know how to get his money and where to get his money in case he is left alone. There are times when he has no idea we are a permanent couple, he thinks either he will go on his way or I will go on mine, and this is the root of his insecurity.

    He was so dejected this morning it reduced me to tears. I had an appointment. He didn`t want to be left alone, I didn`t want to leave him alone, so instead of walking, I booked a taxi and he came with me.

    The headline in the Express this morning was about the benefits of oily fish. He is back on the sardines again and has counted the tins in the cupboard to make sure we have enough.

    He can barely find the cups to make tea, but he found the tins of sardines.
    Necessity has no law.
     
  7. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    16,057
    Toronto, Canada
    It's so sad. And there is no way you can reassure him permanently that you aren't going to leave.

    I hope counting the sardine tins helps to make him happier.
     
  8. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Sylvia, that is sad. Poor Dhiren, it must be awful to be so scared.

    And poor you, that you can't set his mind at rest.

    Love,
     
  9. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    7,788
    East Midlands
    Hello Sylvia...

    This is happening to us too..

    Eric does not want me out of his sight...my explanations about having to do things other than sit and watch TV fall on deaf ears..

    I feel I have to account for/justify every movement I make. and once done..it's forgotten..so I have to do it again..and again.
    I'm fortunate because I do feel happy leaving Eric with the sitters we currently have..even though he's not understanding why they come in. They know him and are capable.

    I'm hoping the sardines don't find their way into the shoe boxes....:eek:

    Love gigi xx
     
  10. Helen33

    Helen33 Registered User

    Jul 20, 2008
    14,697
    Dear Sylvia

    ((((H U G )))

    Love
     
  11. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,098
    Kent
    I managed to cheer him up this evening with a bag of Revels.

    Food again, used as a comforter. He`s diabetic I know, but I`ll take my chances, as the smile on his face as he tucked in was worth it.

    And please don`t ask what I was doing with a bag of revels in the first place. :eek:
     
  12. janjan

    janjan Registered User

    Jan 27, 2006
    229
    Birmingham
    [[hugs]]xxx Thinking of you both.
     
  13. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Sylvia, what were you doing with a bag of Revels?:D:D:D

    Anyway, well done! I agree, if it cheers Dhiren up, then go for it, I say (unless it makes him really ill, and you know him too well for that)

    Love,
     
  14. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    Well my excuse for YOU is that they were a Mothering Sunday gift and you generously offered them to Dhiren because they would benefit him more than you (diet) :rolleyes::rolleyes:eyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

    Love Jan
     
  15. lesmisralbles

    lesmisralbles Account Closed

    Nov 23, 2007
    5,543
    And like me, you keep them in just in case anyone call's round;)

    As you know, I do not eat chocolate:eek:

    Leave me alone:D

    Barb X
     
  16. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,098
    Kent
    9 a.m. this morning I had a phone call from a student SW on the assessment team who has been assigned to me for an assessment for Direct Payments.

    He asked if it was convenient for me to speak to him on the phone. It was, and I was able to discuss openly the problems I have. It was obvious from his questions he had done his homework on Dhiren.

    He will visit tomorrow afternoon.

    I am expecting Terry in the morning so it should be a good day.

    The student SW has given me his email address in case I need to contact him and it isn`t convenient to speak to him on the phone.

    So far, so good. :)
     
  17. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    7,788
    East Midlands
    That's good news, Sylvia.

    It's brilliant the way these people are taking their time to get to know your circumstances...I do hope they can sort something out for you..:)

    Now about those Revels....;):D

    Love gigi xx
     
  18. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    Hello Sylvia:

    Good news. It strikes me that the people assigned to you have had good training - small things like offering to email for convenience.

    Good luck for tomorrow. (No revels, except for Dhiren;)).

    Love Jan
     
  19. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,098
    Kent
    Revels are banned from now on.
    They don`t do Dhiren any favours and they certainly do nothing for me [except satisfy my sugar/chocolate cravings] .
    I`m really looking forwards to this assessment tomorrow and do hope something will come of it.
    I stressed to the SW Student the need to get Dhiren to accept people coming into the house, so eventually I will be able to leave him with them and have a break.
     
  20. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    16,057
    Toronto, Canada
    What's a Revel? Sounds like I would like them.
     
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