A life in the day of.........................
- Thread starter Grannie G
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Sundowning and paranoia
5.30pm.
D `Have you got a strong plastic bag?`
S `In the cupboard under the cooker.`
D `They are not strong enough. I need a strong bag.`
S `What for?`
D `For all my shoes. I`m going now.`
S `All right. I`ll get you one.`
and I gave him a strong plastic bag.
Then.......
D `I`ll miss you.`
S `You don`t need to go.`
D `I might stay here.`
S `Who would you be going to anyway?`
D `My cousins.`
S `Cousins aren`t as good as wives. They won`t even know you.`
D `That`s true.`
Then.......
D `How long are we staying here.`
S `We live here.`
D `I`ve got a house in Manchester.`
S `We sold it to come here.`
D `How do you know? My house is still there.`
S `We sold our house and bought this one. We have nowhere to live in Manchester.`
D `Are you sure?`
S `I`m sure.`
D `If I stay here I can wear trousers. I don`t want to wear a Dhoti.`
S `That`s true.`
D `What`s this place called?`
S `Broadstairs.`
D `How far is it from Manchester?`
S `Three hundred miles.`
D `It`s a long way away. How long does it take to get there?`
S `About six hours.`
D `It`s the best place to be. I don`t know anyone and no-one knows me. No-one will see me in trousers. They won`t tell me to wear a Dhoti. I can hide and no-one will find me.`
5.30pm.
D `Have you got a strong plastic bag?`
S `In the cupboard under the cooker.`
D `They are not strong enough. I need a strong bag.`
S `What for?`
D `For all my shoes. I`m going now.`
S `All right. I`ll get you one.`
and I gave him a strong plastic bag.
Then.......
D `I`ll miss you.`
S `You don`t need to go.`
D `I might stay here.`
S `Who would you be going to anyway?`
D `My cousins.`
S `Cousins aren`t as good as wives. They won`t even know you.`
D `That`s true.`
Then.......
D `How long are we staying here.`
S `We live here.`
D `I`ve got a house in Manchester.`
S `We sold it to come here.`
D `How do you know? My house is still there.`
S `We sold our house and bought this one. We have nowhere to live in Manchester.`
D `Are you sure?`
S `I`m sure.`
D `If I stay here I can wear trousers. I don`t want to wear a Dhoti.`
S `That`s true.`
D `What`s this place called?`
S `Broadstairs.`
D `How far is it from Manchester?`
S `Three hundred miles.`
D `It`s a long way away. How long does it take to get there?`
S `About six hours.`
D `It`s the best place to be. I don`t know anyone and no-one knows me. No-one will see me in trousers. They won`t tell me to wear a Dhoti. I can hide and no-one will find me.`
Dear Sylvia
I don't know much about diabetis so I am unaware of what being given extra medication means. I am glad that Dhiren doesn't have any kind of infection though.
I hope you both have a peaceful night (preferably without whirring, whining noises)!
Alan goes for his cataract operation tomorrow and we have to be at the hospital at 7.30 a.m. so it's an early night for us.
Love
I don't know much about diabetis so I am unaware of what being given extra medication means. I am glad that Dhiren doesn't have any kind of infection though.
I hope you both have a peaceful night (preferably without whirring, whining noises)!
Alan goes for his cataract operation tomorrow and we have to be at the hospital at 7.30 a.m. so it's an early night for us.
Love
Dear Sylvia, Helen has it right when she says:
Dear Helen, just adding my good wishes for a successful outcome for Alan tomorrow.
Thinking of you both.
I second that.
Dear Helen, just adding my good wishes for a successful outcome for Alan tomorrow.
Thinking of you both.
Whirring and whining
We still have whining but I have managed to control it.
I can have the boiler on for an hour before it starts, then I lower the thermostat and it takes five minutes or so to stop. Then after another hour I raise the thermostat so the heat comes on, and to quote the King of Siam, `etcetera, etcetera, etcetera`.
A layperson friend has worked out it must be the condenser. So why couldn`t my heating engineer have worked that out? And why didn`t Warm Front/Warm Sure/the Installer work it out too?
So I have logged it all day and will send a report tomorrow.
Slow processing.......
I posted about Dhiren`s apparent disinterest in the Mumbai sieges yesterday. Today the penny dropped and he has been engrossed in the news all day.
But now he has forgotten all about it.
We still have whining but I have managed to control it.
I can have the boiler on for an hour before it starts, then I lower the thermostat and it takes five minutes or so to stop. Then after another hour I raise the thermostat so the heat comes on, and to quote the King of Siam, `etcetera, etcetera, etcetera`.
A layperson friend has worked out it must be the condenser. So why couldn`t my heating engineer have worked that out? And why didn`t Warm Front/Warm Sure/the Installer work it out too?
So I have logged it all day and will send a report tomorrow.
Slow processing.......
I posted about Dhiren`s apparent disinterest in the Mumbai sieges yesterday. Today the penny dropped and he has been engrossed in the news all day.
But now he has forgotten all about it.
A difficult day................
Dhiren spent nearly the whole of yesterday with a tortured expression on his face.
From getting up, he didn`t know where he was or who he was.
He told me he was unable to make sense of anything.
Somehow in the middle of the day, a window appeared to enable him to make a curry for Paul, who is coming to watch the football at lunchtime today.. I prepared all the ingredients except the spices, and he made an excellent curry with no additional help from me.
And when evening came he asked where we had been.
We had been nowhere.
He was certain we had been out to beautiful shops.
We ate our dinner.
We went back to the living room.
We sat for a short while.
He asked when we would be having our dinner.
He sat with a glazed expression, I couldn`t reach him.
He wandered around the house.
He came from the kitched to tell me there was a beautiful curry cooling on the worktop. He asked when I made it. I told him he had made it. He was shocked.
He asked where he was sleeping tonight. I showed him our bedroom. He said `I know this room.`
At 10pm. he went to bed.
At 12 midninght he woke.
He was looking for Paul. He thought Paul still lived with us.
He asked about his pension. My heart sank.
Then followed two hours interrogation about his money, his pension, how he lived without working, how I lived without working.
I gave him his bank books. He wanted to go to the bank, withdraw the money, and put it in the bank..
He said `I can`t understand anything.`
At 2am I went to bed. He said he would come later.
He came to bed. He asked what I was doing in his bed.
I told him it is my bed too.
He asked who I was.
I said, `I am Sylvia. I am your wife.`
He said, `If you say so.`
He finally slept.
His first words on waking, `Are we going home today?`
I replied, `We are home.`
Then
`Are we going home today or tomorrow?`
I replied, `We are staying here today and tomorrow and for ever, because we are home.`
He said `What a relief.`
Dhiren spent nearly the whole of yesterday with a tortured expression on his face.
From getting up, he didn`t know where he was or who he was.
He told me he was unable to make sense of anything.
Somehow in the middle of the day, a window appeared to enable him to make a curry for Paul, who is coming to watch the football at lunchtime today.. I prepared all the ingredients except the spices, and he made an excellent curry with no additional help from me.
And when evening came he asked where we had been.
We had been nowhere.
He was certain we had been out to beautiful shops.
We ate our dinner.
We went back to the living room.
We sat for a short while.
He asked when we would be having our dinner.
He sat with a glazed expression, I couldn`t reach him.
He wandered around the house.
He came from the kitched to tell me there was a beautiful curry cooling on the worktop. He asked when I made it. I told him he had made it. He was shocked.
He asked where he was sleeping tonight. I showed him our bedroom. He said `I know this room.`
At 10pm. he went to bed.
At 12 midninght he woke.
He was looking for Paul. He thought Paul still lived with us.
He asked about his pension. My heart sank.
Then followed two hours interrogation about his money, his pension, how he lived without working, how I lived without working.
I gave him his bank books. He wanted to go to the bank, withdraw the money, and put it in the bank..
He said `I can`t understand anything.`
At 2am I went to bed. He said he would come later.
He came to bed. He asked what I was doing in his bed.
I told him it is my bed too.
He asked who I was.
I said, `I am Sylvia. I am your wife.`
He said, `If you say so.`
He finally slept.
His first words on waking, `Are we going home today?`
I replied, `We are home.`
Then
`Are we going home today or tomorrow?`
I replied, `We are staying here today and tomorrow and for ever, because we are home.`
He said `What a relief.`
Hello Sylvia:
I feel for you! What else is there to say?
I do hope Dhiren 'comes out' of this phase soon for both your sakes. What a horrible illness, ain't it
Love Jan
PS If it is any comfort at all, David now only talks gobblegook - mumbling and no coherent sentences. Awful!
I feel for you! What else is there to say?
I do hope Dhiren 'comes out' of this phase soon for both your sakes. What a horrible illness, ain't it
Love Jan
PS If it is any comfort at all, David now only talks gobblegook - mumbling and no coherent sentences. Awful!
Sylvia ,your post struck a cord with me. When i shared Ron's bed becuase a lady friend was staying i thought he would be pleased, he always liked to cuddle and kiss. Well in the middle of the night he pulled the duvet off me and said get out of my bed he also said more than once whats your name?
so sorry you are having so many ups and downs with Dhiren. Ron had vas dem and i think it is different in a sense.
lots of love Cynthia x x
he also said more than once whats your name?so sorry you are having so many ups and downs with Dhiren. Ron had vas dem and i think it is different in a sense.
lots of love Cynthia x x
Thank you Jan, for giving me time and thought in the midst of all your own worries about David.
Thank you Cynthia. There is a possibility Dhiren has mixed vas. dem. and AD.
Love to you both, all of us at different stages, all of us in tune.
Somehow I doubt it. I feel this might be another step down.
Thank you Cynthia. There is a possibility Dhiren has mixed vas. dem. and AD.
This completely contradicts the lovely Christmas photo you posted recently. It shows how we can never be sure of behaviours, whethr they`re temporary or about to become fixed.
Love to you both, all of us at different stages, all of us in tune.
Hello Sylvia
I'm sorry that you had such a difficult day - I think it's par for the course now and just being grateful for the temporary reliefs.
I just want to send a hug and love and to say that I am thinking about you.
Love
I'm sorry that you had such a difficult day - I think it's par for the course now and just being grateful for the temporary reliefs.
You mentioned that a window opened up and later Dhiren mentions the above. Perhaps it was like window shopping for him - something beautiful out of the confusion and loss. After that it seems like Dhiren is desperate to make sense of things but, of course, it cannot be achieved permanently but Dhiren doesn't know that
I just want to send a hug and love and to say that I am thinking about you.
Love
Dear Sylvia
I'm sorry you had such a bad day yesterday.
How was today? Did Dhiren managage to watch and enjoy the game? Good result... for you.
I'm sorry you had such a bad day yesterday.
How was today? Did Dhiren managage to watch and enjoy the game? Good result... for you.
Thank you Helen and Sue
We had a good day today until 9pm. He enjoyed the football and Paul thought he was sharper than he`s been for a while.
Perhaps it is me.
He started to ask about money again and I refused to talk about it, just saying I`ll go for his pension tomorrow.
Now the supermarket carrier is out again and his shoes and hat at the ready.
He is convinced he will be going away tomorrow and there are times I wish he would.
But I don`t really mean it and I know he won`t go anywhere.
We had a good day today until 9pm. He enjoyed the football and Paul thought he was sharper than he`s been for a while.
Perhaps it is me.
He started to ask about money again and I refused to talk about it, just saying I`ll go for his pension tomorrow.
Now the supermarket carrier is out again and his shoes and hat at the ready.
He is convinced he will be going away tomorrow and there are times I wish he would.
But I don`t really mean it and I know he won`t go anywhere.
Hi Sylvia
Back to your heating problem. Does it need topped up with water?
We have wet underfloor heating and when it was installed, I frequently had to top up the water to get rid of the air in the system.
When the water pressure dropped, I had a whining noise. I knew then to open the water loop, top up valve?? and the pressure came up again, whining stopped.
I am no heating expert, just a suggestion, as it is a new system.
thinking of you
Alfjess
Back to your heating problem. Does it need topped up with water?
We have wet underfloor heating and when it was installed, I frequently had to top up the water to get rid of the air in the system.
When the water pressure dropped, I had a whining noise. I knew then to open the water loop, top up valve?? and the pressure came up again, whining stopped.
I am no heating expert, just a suggestion, as it is a new system.
thinking of you
Alfjess
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