A Letter To My Mother I Cannot Send

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by JackieJames, Oct 28, 2015.

  1. JackieJames

    JackieJames Registered User

    Dec 31, 2014
    83
    USA
    To My Mother:
    I love you so very much. I think you know this on a certain level. I no longer know what to do. My hands are tied. My heart breaks for you. I want you here but I don’t want you to suffer any longer. These are two seemingly contradictory wishes. As I pray for you to live through each and every crisis, at times I wish you could just go in peace. I felt guilty at first for having these feelings, but I now know that both come from a place of love. Either way I suffer. But it is not about me; this is about you. Oh my dear God, please do what is best for my mother.
    I miss you, yet you are with me. I love you, yet I get frustrated and angry. It is not you I am angry at, it is this awful disease that strips away your dignity, independence, and the very essence of you.
    I will try to remember the good times, the way you gave to so many throughout your life. Your unending patience. Oh my dear mother, you do not deserve this. No one does.
     
  2. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    8,007
    Norfolk
    That's enough to bring anybody to tears, JackieJames. I do so feel for you.
     
  3. jeany123

    jeany123 Registered User

    Mar 24, 2012
    19,036
    Durham
    Jackie that is lovely, it made me cry,

    xxxx Jeany,
     
  4. nannylondon

    nannylondon Registered User

    Apr 7, 2014
    2,475
    London
    What a moving post brought tears to my eyes I totally understand how you feel the anger at this disease is felt by lots of us sending you a big hug ((((( ))))) xx
     
  5. disi

    disi Registered User

    Jackie what a wonderful post, brought tears to my eyes.
     
  6. CollegeGirl

    CollegeGirl Registered User

    Jan 19, 2011
    9,525
    North East England
    Me too. You wrote so eloquently and put all my own thoughts into words.
    xx
     
  7. Ann422

    Ann422 Registered User

    Aug 9, 2015
    35
    USA
    Thank you.
     
  8. Kazsul

    Kazsul Registered User

    Sep 13, 2015
    19
    North somerset
    Jackie, your words and thoughts could be mine. Never wanting to lose your loved one but a never ending ache in your heart as each day passes and you lose a little more.


    Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
     

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