A feeling of immense relief

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by David0169, Jan 12, 2015.

  1. David0169

    David0169 Registered User

    Apr 3, 2013
    I have just had a visit from the CPN which was requested before Christmas (the last one said that their was nothing more they could do last August) as I felt my ex-partner was getting worse and she has confirmed what I thought which is a relief, but the great thing is she actually sat and listened to me and spoke in depth about what will happen next and that I should at some point start looking for more residential care in terms of carers breaks (last one January 2014).

    I know it sounds trivial but I feel as tho a weight has been lifted of my shoulders and that someone actually cares instead of just leaving us to get on with it and struggle on a daily basis. I know this isn't easy for anyone and I am prepared to face whatever happens as I refuse to put him into residential care full time as I feel that whatever time he has left then he should spend it with people he just about knows (even tho he thinks I'm his brother) and I know he's happy, infact just seeing him sat with a smile on his face makes me happy.
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    Word of advice - don't wait for a crisis. Take up the offer of respite or day care immediately. I have spent the last two years saying I was fine and now that I really need some cover I am well down the waiting list. I should have put John's name on the list straight away as it takes time to sort out.
  3. creativesarah

    creativesarah Registered User

    theres nothing like someone actually listening!
  4. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    Isn't it lovely when someone actually listens, and better still, when they understand. Take up any offers, even if it's just for an odd day or 2, here or there. Otherwise, as others have said, you may plummet down the list. Good luck to you both.
  5. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    Thing is, David, you may feel now as though you've been 'heard', but the proof of that particular pudding is in the eating, so to speak. Don't allow yourself to become another forgotten case. Chase up your needs on a regular basis.

    Good luck. :)
  6. lin1

    lin1 Registered User

    Jan 14, 2010
    East Kent
    #6 lin1, Jan 13, 2015
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2015
    Hello David. Welcome to TP

    It is good that the CPN listened to you, knowing someone has listened does make a difference to how you feel.
    Sadly many of us on here have been promised lots and lots with little or no actual results , I sincerely hope this is not the case for you.
    One thing I have learned is, it is the squeakiest wheel that gets the most oil, so my advise to you is not to be too patient

    If you are in the UK
    The Alzheimer's society can put you in contact with your local branch.
    amongst other things you will find the helpline number here

    Admiral nurses. are specialist dementia nurses, run by a charity, they are not hands on nurses, they provide info, emotional support. sadly they are few and far between they do have a National helpline.
  7. Not so Rosy

    Not so Rosy Registered User

    Nov 30, 2013
    Dads CPN was one of my saviours tbh.

    Him and the Macmillan nurse did more for us than I could of ever asked for, all done without any fuss and behind the scenes. Services and help just fell into place. I only found out some months later who had put in all the leg work.

    I hope your CPN comes in for you.

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