a bit lost

[Skye]

Tina, so sorry that you have had to suffer two such great losses in such short a time.

Take care of yourself now, you've been such a loving niece, and now it's time to look after yourself.

Don't be alone, Tina, you have so many friends on TP.

 

[Tina]

Thank you...

... so much for all your messages. They are so full of support and concern and sympathy that it makes me feel quite overwhelmed. I don't really have the words to thank you properly, head's a bit fuzzy, but your thoughts and words and feelings mean such a lot.
I'm, well, ok....sort of...don't know really...bit confused. But I'm with aunties and uncles and cousins and we're all taking care of each other. There's a lot to do and to organise, so that's keeping us busy. The sadness is pretty awful even though there is comfort in knowing Aunty Jean and Uncle Harry are together again, as they were always meant to be. The void they have left is...well... indescribable. We'll be ok in the end, they would want us to get on and continue to do our best. It's just so bl***y hard at the moment.
I'll be checking in and out of TP when there's time and reading along. Can't really contribute much at the moment, am not really very good company right now, but it'll get better and then I'll pipe up again. Wouldn't want to miss the company of friends...
Love, Tina x

 

[Áine]

Oh Tina, what a nightmare. How awful for you to lose them both like this. Easier for your uncle this was though I guess, but it's dreadful shock for you and leaves such big hole in your life.

I don't think you should worry about whether you're being good company on TP. You're here, you're a friend ........ be who you are - there's always people pleased to see you no matter how you're feeling.

Love
Áine

 

[Nell]

Since my Dad died I've been a bit "numb" emotionally, but your post about Uncle Harry's death brought me to tears. Thank you for sharing with us your grief. They were so lucky to have you as a niece - and they knew it. Take comfort in your memories. Sending you a big {{{HUG}}}Nell

 

[Tina]

at rest and together

We accompanied Uncle Harry on his final journey today...so hard even though so loving and full of fond memories. Actually his final final journey will be tomorrow when his ashes will be brought home and scattered where Aunty Jean's are, so they'll both be home together.
Lots of people turned out again, surreal to be going through the same procedures so shortly after the last time. We had lovely readings and hymns and I'd written a tribute to them both, which I couldn't read, so Mike did.

And now? Well, I don't know...it's all so final and there's this huge great big gaping hole...and it hurts...how's that for stating the bleeding obvious...
Being in their house is oh so painful but also comforting in a strange way. You come in through the door, everything is as it always was, it smells the same, it looks the same, you see things and remember, you look at books on shelves, pictures on the wall, the fireplace in the dining room, and memories come flooding in. Happy memories, of happy times, and plenty of them. And then reality dawns...Hard to believe Uncle Harry won't be walking in through the door. His things, and many of Aunty Jean's, are still in the same place where they had been left.

I went through a chest of drawers and a cabinet with Mike and his wife yesterday...all my letters and card from when I was about 10 years old, every single one of them, are there, neatly piled and tied with bits of string. Souvenirs from their travels, photographs of family events and holidays and many other occasions, photographs of when they were young and courting, of their wedding,...
Mike says I'm allowed to pick some things as keepsakes, so there'll be a right old trip down memory lane before I go home at the weekend.
"Cheer up, carry on, and do your best."...I can hear it loud and clear...

Tina

 

[Áine]

hello Tina ..... thanks for sharing this, I was wondering how you were. it sounds like you did him proud on his final journey. reading the part about the house made me cry .... it's all so sudden, so recent, so hard to even believe i guess. how lovely (and painful) to find all your cards and letters lovingly collected and tied together.

"cheer up and carry on" but give yourself time to grieve too

hugs

Áine

 

[alex]

Hiya Tina

What can i say?............except that i know where you are at the moment, its so much for you to have to take in all at once...........your feelings, your thoughts, your memories, even your head will be all over the place!............i'd like to say something that will make you feel better..... ease the pain a little, but i can't...........you know the old saying 'better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all'.........the pain is because you loved them...........if you didn't love them you'd have no pain.............what would you rather have?...........with me?...........i'd take the pain every time.........maybe its a small price to pay for the memories.

Hang on in there......your friends are thinking about you.
Love Alex x

 

[Cate]

Hiya Tina

No words at a time like this are adequate or can come close to take your pain away, I am so very sorry for your loss.

Give yourself time and look after yourself.

Love

Cate xx

 

[Skye]

Dear Tina
Thank you for posting, you've been so much in my thoughts this week.

Of course you feel empty, you will for a long while yet, And Christmas will be very difficult for you.

But how lovely to find all your letters and cards. It must make you feel so warm, to know how much you were loved. Try to focus on that warm feeling as much as possible, and be happy that your aunt and uncle are together.

Take care of yourself, and keep posting, to let us know how you are getting on.

Love,

 

[Grannie G]

Dear Tina, So much sadness........Don`t fight the pain, we are all thinking about you. Love Sylvia x

 

[Tina]

Thanks again for all your kind words and concern and messages of support.
I'm ok-ish. We scattered the ashes this morning...reunited and at home together again...
How sad I am they're not here any more but how glad they were part of my life and always will be. Where would I be today and what would I have missed had they not been around at all...

Tina

 

[mel]

Hi Tina
You have been through so much over the last months.....this is such a difficult time for you now. I just want you to know we're all here for you and it will take time but you will get through it and the pain will ease in time...
Thinking of you
Take care
love and hugs
Wendy xx