A better visit

[Rosalind]

I posted a little while ago about a quite awful visit to my husband in nursing home, where he swore at me and made the whole thing seem utterly pointless.

I girded loins and did another visit today, and while conversation is zilch he enjoyed some cherries I had brought in for him. I sat and did the crossword, and after a while he did his usual thing of getting up and wandering out of the room. I then found him drifting hand in hand along the corridor with an elderly lady patient. No Peggy Woolley moment for me - I was delighted he had someone to hold hands with. He did not take any notice of my departure, even though they walked past me at the lift.

Neither of us seem to get much out of visits (apart from topping up his supply of shampoo, etc) but that is probably much better than if he begged me to stay.

 

[jenniferpa]

Dear Rosalind

I guess it is what it is. If you can visit and not find it too disturbing or distressing, sometimes that's the most one can hope for.

Take care of yourself.

 

[Canadian Joanne]

Rosalind, it was a better visit, wasn't it? I'm glad you're not upset by the hand in hand thing - so many people are (understandably) but it is the disease and, as Jennifer said, it is what it is.

I always visit my mother at mealtimes, because then I can feed her. She's not capable of conversation and I'm sure she has no idea who I am. But it makes me feel better to feed her, tidy her dresser and closet, shave her chin once a week and do other little things for her.

 

[Norrms]

Just to say

Hiya, just to say glad you had a better visit, best wishes, Norrms and family xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Grannie G]

It`s good your husband has a new friend Rosalind,it will help him feel safe. Your visits should be much easier from now on.

 

[CaPattinson]

holding hands

Hi Ros, this story made me smile. Just imagining them walking down the corridor, no harm, just nice. Like has been said it sounds that your visits will be calmer and better in future. Good to hear! Take care xxx Christine.