Hi all. I haven't posted on TP for a while. Adjusting to my new status has been hard. I was visiting Lex on a Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings, but found that I was a wreck for most of the afternoon. I have now adjusted this to only Tuesday and Thursday mornings and am finding myself adjusting slowly. Unfortunately I have received criticism from his mother as a result of this decision. She tells me that she visited his Dad EVERY day when he was in care (also Alzheimers), and I should do the same. Fortunately I am only a two minute drive away from the care facility, and on the summer days to come maybe I will walk. I do find it hard to visit - Lex hardly ever has conversation and I have to have one way conversations. He is always asking how long we will be before we leave, but not how long before we go home. I think he believes we are at some hotel on holiday, as he mentions getting packed and on the road. He doesn't seem to know he has been there since May. The darling caregivers tease me about the terrible bladder problem I must have, as when I am ready to leave, I tell him I am just popping off to the toilet. Apparently he never asks where I have gone, because his memory is such now that even a couple of minutes is a struggle. I have been trying to re-establish my life, taking a fuller interest in activities I had let go. I hadn't realised how much I had not been doing. I am mainly fine during the day, but as I close the curtains and sit down after tea, the reality hits home. I am now on my own and he won't be coming home again. Who gave that alien permission to invade my darling husband's brain and body????