3 days in a care home. Advice please. My mother in law was diagnosed with vascular dementia 2 years ago. She's declined rapidly in that time. All the usual stuff - keeping odd hours, calling 60 times a day, not knowing where she is, refusing to wash/eat/take her medication. She rarely went out and was clearly lonely. Although we visited every day she frequently called to say that she never saw anyone. Until 3 weeks ago we were getting by with visiting her daily and employing a carer to see her every morning to make sure she took her medication and a cleaner to keep on top of the house. It was hard work, but we were managing. Just. Then she fell whilst out with her sister, breaking her hip and wrist. From the moment she went into hospital her condition deteriorated badly. She didn't know where she was, why she was there and was often aggressive and violent with the staff. For the first few days we assumed that her deterioration was due to the change of routine / anaesthetic / shock but 3 weeks later and she wasn't much better. 2 weeks ago, we met with the social worker and together with the hospital decided that when she was discharged, she would need full time care. She'd need a care home. Her 'challenging behavior' meant that places were limited. We visited all on the shortlist and chose the best. We filled out the continuing care pathway form with the hospital and were told that she'd probably be considered for full local authority funding. 3 days ago, she was transferred to the care home. Within 5 minutes she'd been abusive and caused an argument between 2 other residents and a fight had to be broken up. It was decided that she'd need to be in the unit of the home which housed the most severe cases of dementia. We've visited her each day for the last 3 days and each day she's been improved. Today she was almost back to how she was before the fall. She knows where she is and is resigned to it. While this improvement is great, it's made us feel incredibly guilty. Have we done the right thing by putting her into a home? Have we put our needs above hers? It's just awful. What I want to know is, is it usual for people to improve dramatically in this way on entering a care home? Does it last? Should we enquire about moving her out of the 'severe' unit that she's in? We really don't know what to do for the best.