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11 days no fluids or food or meds


Registered User
Aug 28, 2014
Thank you to everyone for your kind messages. I know it's still early days but I am doing my best to cope and carry on as mum would want me too. I am planning the funeral for mum and trying to include a poem or a short reading about the journey with dementia. If anybody has any inspiration or examples they have used or found please can you feedback. As I want to do my best for mum at her final farewell. Thank you again everybody's support means so much x
Sorry that I missed your post when you made it. Im so sorry you lost your Mum. It sounds like a peaceful passing after you both endured so much. It might be too late, but this is a poem I found that I would use for my own Mums funeral. It described our journey through dementia. I hope it brings you some comfort in the days ahead. You were her everything and we salute you.

by Brenda Houck

Do not ask me to remember
Don’t try to make me understand
Let me rest and know you’re with me
Kiss my cheek and hold my hand.

I’m confused beyond your concept
I am sad and sick and lost
All I know is that I need you
To be with me at all cost.

Do not lose your patience with me
Do not scold or curse or cry
I can’t help the way I’m acting
Can’t be different though I try.

Just remember that I need you
That the best of me is gone
Please don’t fail to stand beside me
Love me until my life is done.

I didn’t ask for this affliction,
I didn’t want this day to come
Though I sensed my soul was leaving
As my body began to roam

Hold me when I start to tremble,
When I stare away so far.
Only you can bring me comfort,
Though I may not know who you are.

When my life is over
And your normal days return
Know how much I loved you
And how much you really learned.

About life and death and sickness
And the pain that each can bring
Know you were my angel,
You were my everything.


Registered User
Apr 12, 2013
Thank you to everyone for your kind messages and words of support during this sad time. My Mum was laid to rest with my father yesterday, it was a beautiful send off and it will stay in my heart forever. I am so grateful for the support that I have been given on this website over the past years, sometimes on those days when you feel there was nobody to speak to, but there was somebody to link to on here. The days where the tears just rolled down my face but could be consoled by the helpful advice given on here. I hope to gain strength from the passing of my beloved mum and in time be able to heal and give support back to those who may be going through the same. God Bless xx


Registered User
Apr 5, 2013
So many mixed emotions .
You must be exhausted.
I hope you are managing to get some rest and support to get your batteries recharged.
This thread has had me in tears.
I'm so sorry for your loss.


Sent from my iPad using Talking Point


New member
Nov 28, 2018
Hi Flower1, i know this post was made a few years back now and you probably havent used this for a while but i just wanted to say that we are currently going through the same that you went through almost identical stories and as i was feeling so down and upset yesterday after a long CHC meeting and the fact my nan (my 2nd mom) is deterioting now and struggling to fight off the chest infections, pneumonia and the aspiration i stumbled upon your posts. I hope you have found some peace now and are living your life knowing that you did everything possible for your mom she would be proud of you. Alot of families just leave their relative to waste away on their own ive seen it with my own eyes and cant believe people can be so cruel. I just wanted to let you know even after all these years that your posts have helped me alot. We are currently into the 3rd year which feels like a never ending battle but i will keep fighting for my nan and make sure she is cared for and respected until this nightmare ends for her and my family. People think that because she has dementia you are prepared but im not, i know my heart will break into pieces the day she goes :( Dementia not only affects the person but also the family and i know myself il never be the person i was before, it changes you and life will never be the same again x