Hello to you all!
HB, I saw your comment on Ann's thread; thank you for your good wishes and the support.
For those who didn't see my update, this past Saturday my mother was discharged from the rehab facility back home to her regular care home. It feels like a long time since February 2, when she fell and broke her kneecap.
She was assessed today by her care home's therapy team, but I haven't heard from them yet (probably will hear Tuesday) about what their proposed therapy plan will be.
I am glad to have her home. She got great care at rehab, but she was bored and still somewhat disoriented. I am hoping the familiar surroundings and faces of her care home, and a return to her routine there, will help with her orientation. Either that, or I will see how far her dementia has progressed, I suppose. As long as she's not upset or agitated or, god forbid, delirious (that hospital-induced delirium is no laughing matter, I can tell you), I guess I don't care where she thinks she is.
In other news, my husband did give me his cold, and I've been sick since about last Thursday. (Those of you who read Molly's thread over in Difficult Feelings know just how sick he was.) I was feeling especially bad Saturday and Sunday, but a bit more human today.
This is good because my husband badgered me until I agreed to go on a holiday. I am joining my sister-in-law and her eldest daughter, my Niece, in New York City for five nights! It's my niece's first time in NYC, and in fact, this is a delayed birthday trip for her 13th birthday. SIL has been to New York once, for a couple of days. I've been there quite a few more times than that, which I guess makes me the (reluctant) expert. Niece is very mature for her age, responsible, studious, and has a good head on her shoulders so we will be fine. (She might be my husband's favourite out of all 11 of the nieces and nephews. I keep telling him we're not meant to have favourites but he doesn't listen.)
For those of you who remember the saga about my FIL last summer, well, Niece's birthday was the day my FIL, her granddad, went into hospital, never to return. And then they got home and my SIL broke both her wrists in a bicycle accident. Yes, this is the same SIL with 4 kids and a puppy I went to my in-laws with last summer, when FIL was dying.
Normally I would be very excited but with the cold and my mother, well, I'm sort of looking forward to it but not quite the way I used to be about travel. (I love to travel and used to travel A LOT...and then dementia happened. I haven't been able to enjoy trips in the same way ever since. Something else dementia has to answer for, I suppose.) Nevertheless, in between blowing my nose and taking cold medicine today I slowly but steadily worked on getting ready to go out of town. I have a couple of errands tomorrow and need to pack, and then I leave Wednesday morning.
Enough about me.
HB, I am sorry to hear about your mum's decline. I hope there isn't anything physical going on (like a blood pressure problem or pain) making her not want to get out of bed. Although if you can't see any signs of discomfort, well, she may just be tired.
I agree that it seems like it's happened so quickly, thinking back through your posts. I hope it's just temporary, but of course you never know. I haven't any advice to offer, just sympathy and lots of trans-Atlantic (((((hugs))))).
Very best wishes to everyone and thank you all for your kindness and support.
HB so sorry to hear about your Mum's decline. It all seems to have come on so rapidly and must be distressing to see. I hope she can be as comfortable as possible. Gx
How sad to hear of your mum's further decline HB. Is she now not talking at all? How upsetting. Is there any chance that some of her meds may be causing too much of a 'chemical cosh'? I've seen my own mum under the influence in hospital and she was greatly affected. I think sometimes it must be hard to know though whether the dementia is progressing or if some of the meds may be causing symptoms too.
I too am usually quite 'tough' and don't cry easily or get too emotional, but am sure I have shed more tears in the past year and a half than over the rest of my life.
I hope you find your mum in a more comfortable state when you next visit.
thanks Marnie x
No, Mum can still talk, just not converse, if you get what I mean. She is really only repeating something back from what I've just said or something vaguely related or totally unrelated in fact.
The NH/GP have reduced the dosage of the risperidone to the bare minimum/ I think this is just the nature of the disease's progression.
How's your Mum? And how are you?
HillyBilly, I'm sorry to read about your mum's decline. It's sad. Hope you are ok. X
Mum is still calmish and stable, no great decline, but since the chest infection she's being plagued with conjunctivitis, very red eyes at the moment, but fortunately it doesn't seem to bother her.
I think I'm just feeling particularly low at the moment - the dental treatment is hard to be cheerful about on top of mum's dementia - and then I sat and watched the news yesterday afternoon, and just sat and cried ...
HI HB - just saw you posted elsewhere today is your birthday - so happy birthday - hope you enjoyed your fizz
Belated Happy Birthday HB 🍾🍾🍸🍸🍸🍾🍸🍾🍸 ( that's wine n gasses in case it doesn't show up!!
Thanks for the birthday wishes! Another year on the clock
Mum has been weaned off the risperidone and started on a low dose of Seroquel (quetiapine). (Isn't it strange how all these anxiety-reducing drugs are not supposed to be used on the elderly with dementia?)
I don't know if the change in meds has had an "adverse" effect but Mum has been having disturbed nights and consequently is wanting to sleep most of the day. Last visit I could hardly get a word out of her and gave up my inane small talk in the end and just sat quietly with her.
She was up and in one of the sitting rooms but sort of slumped forward in the armchair. She was talking a bit in her sleep too - sounded like she was distressed by whatever she was dreaming about. Then she came out with the only coherent thing she's said in a while which was "I'd rather be in bed". So I asked her if she'd like to go back to bed and she said "It doesn't hurt so much in bed". Indicated that she had a pain in her upper tummy area. So I relayed this info to the senior nurse who asked me if Mum had indicated if she was at all hungry (her lunch sitting was already going on). Asked Mum if she fancied some lunch, was she hungry at all? Mum said yes, a bit hungry. So they wheeled her off to try and get some food into her and I slipped away.
So maybe this is the new norm or maybe once the new drugs kick in she'll...I don't know what!
It's highly coincidental but where we live, we only have three sets of neighbours and two of those families have relatives in the same NH that Mum's in (and it's not the closest NH either by any means). One lady is only in her 60s and is totally chair/bed bound. Very sad. The other was in her 90s and she has just passed away. This bloody disease is everywhere. It's like Japanese knotweed.
I am trying (but failing) to restore some sort of "meaning" to my life. I feel like I've been stuck in a sort of limbo for months. I've appealed the refusal of my BTWEA application (with the help of a very kind professional mentor-type person). But I also need a Plan B (I think I'm actually on Plan X, Y or Z by now) so have been applying for jobs left, right and centre. There was one that I was very keen on but I was rejected on Monday after passing the initial stages so that was a bit of a knock. After that (I may be completely mad to be even considering this) I stumbled upon a vacancy for a home carer with the local branch of the Alzheimer Society of Ireland. I have applied
On my last return trip from the NH I took a slightly different route and was musing to myself about whether the elderly gent I gave a lift to last week would be stuck waiting for a lift on the other road. When blow me down I spotted him thumbing a lift on the road I was on! We're becoming quite acquainted now!
The anti psychotics are quite "heavy" for the elderly, HB. Quetiapine had no affect at all on William, so he was put on risperidone, and thankfully, that worked really well for him, and he was lucky enough not to suffer any side effects from it.
I hope you find some work soon. And/or get the BTWEA.
Sent from my Moto G Play using Talking Point mobile app