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Thread: Frustrated!!

  1. #1
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    Frustrated!!

    Please can anyone advise, my mom is in a care home with vascular dementia, my sibling, who I have no contact with whatsoever and will not, has been given a job there and when i visit she keeps strutting around and I feel as though she is trying to listen to every word, is this allowed for her to be there,she does not have a carer position.

    Many thanks x

  2. #2
    Registered User marionq's Avatar
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    Rise above it Mary. Don't let it get to you. What if she does listen. Youre not planning anything illegal just visiting your Mum.

  3. #3
    Registered User Lawson58's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mary9 View Post
    Please can anyone advise, my mom is in a care home with vascular dementia, my sibling, who I have no contact with whatsoever and will not, has been given a job there and when i visit she keeps strutting around and I feel as though she is trying to listen to every word, is this allowed for her to be there,she does not have a carer position.

    Many thanks x
    With your relationship with your sister is as bad as it appears, this is your big opportunity!

    You need to be at your charming best. Smile, be pleasant and dignified and you will come out looking like the grown-up. Don't sweat the petty stuff. Your mum is much more important than any silliness there is with your sister.


    Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.

    Isaac Asimov

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    Hi, frustrating for sure. Lawson has given good suggestions here.

    Whilst you will not believe it at the moment - what comes around goes around. Your sister will, somewhere along the line, show her colours in the care home.

    Keep grinning and share here.

  5. #5
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    If you are uncomfortable visiting your mum when your sister is there, is there any way around it - could you visit at a time of day or on a weekend when she is not working, or take your mum outside into the garden or for a trip out, or sit in her room when you are visiting?

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by marionq View Post
    Rise above it Mary. Don't let it get to you. What if she does listen. Youre not planning anything illegal just visiting your Mum.
    Thank you I know, but it is just frustrating it is my time with my Mom, not hers too 😏

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lawson58 View Post
    With your relationship with your sister is as bad as it appears, this is your big opportunity!

    You need to be at your charming best. Smile, be pleasant and dignified and you will come out looking like the grown-up. Don't sweat the petty stuff. Your mum is much more important than any silliness there is with your sister.
    I know, i am trying very, very hard, but it is my time with her 😏

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oh Knickers View Post
    Hi, frustrating for sure. Lawson has given good suggestions here.

    Whilst you will not believe it at the moment - what comes around goes around. Your sister will, somewhere along the line, show her colours in the care home.

    Keep grinning and share here.
    Thank you, yes I keep banking on the fact she will eventually show her true colours!! 😏😁

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by arielsmelody View Post
    If you are uncomfortable visiting your mum when your sister is there, is there any way around it - could you visit at a time of day or on a weekend when she is not working, or take your mum outside into the garden or for a trip out, or sit in her room when you are visiting?
    Thank you, but I have no idea of when she works or not, mom is now unable to be taken out of the home, and doesn't like to really go outside as she is not too mobile any more, we sit in her room but the home does request that doors are left open 😏

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