Search results

  1. C

    Rudeness and Agression

    Hi Natashalou I haven't posted on here for quite a while but having read your recent postings it prompted me to write again. I do sympathise with you. I also have a mother who is verbally very aggressive to me, and has been since my father died in June. I haven't actually see her for about 2...
  2. C

    Verbal aggression - no sign tonight

    Went to see Mum today. All went well. It was a bit like treading on eggshells but there was no mention of the gas cooker. I read a report in the carers notes from yesterday where the carer had said to mum that she felt she ought to ring me, having seen the letter that I wrote. Mum had said...
  3. C

    Verbal aggression - no sign tonight

    I had a phone call from my mum tonight (shock, horror), the first one for months, and she didn't shout at me once. I think the heart-felt letter I sent her prompted a call. We talked about 20 minutes and although the gas cooker did come into the conversation she didn't call me any horrid names...
  4. C

    New User

    Dear Sylvia Thank you for your kind words. I won't hold my breath with regards to mum though. Chris x
  5. C

    New User

    I am so pleased to hear that things at the moment are better with your mum, mellow yellow. I have not posted anything on here for a while (although I am logged in most days), mainly because there has been no change in my mother who is still verbally aggressive towards me. I now visit once a...
  6. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    Thank you Thank you so much for your kind words. They mean an awful lot and have certainly kept me going through some very dark moments. I certainly won't give up, but I will leave it a few weeks before making contact again. As I have said before, I didn't have a bad childhood, just not a...
  7. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    She may have had difficulty expressing her thoughts and feelings in the past, but she definitely has no problem expressing them now!
  8. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    Again, it's reassuring, but also very sad that there are others who feel like me. I seem to have started a whole new subject! What you say about losing a parent you were close to must be horrendous. I wouldn't say my childhood was bad, but it wasn't as loving as my friends relationships with...
  9. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    I am sorry that you too have experienced this behaviour. How did you cope with it?
  10. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    Out of character I keep thinking about whether it is out of character. As I mentioned before we were never particular close and I always felt she was disappointed in me. There was never a lot of affection, either towards myself or my children from mum and dad. She was always very strict with...
  11. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    "What exactly does visiting a nasty, rude abusive old woman who tells me she hates me actually achieve"? I couldn't have put it better myself Natashalou. The guilt is immense though. I will leave it for a few months. I agree Grannie G, oh to be a fly on the wall. I wonder what she will...
  12. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    You are quite right. I've rung her to say I won't be over today and said goodbye and put the phone down before she had a chance to say anything. She is probably really pleased because she didn't want to see me anyway! I will try and chill out today but still feel really wound up and shaky...
  13. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    Hi Deborah. I usually do visit during the week on my day off, but my husband was going to come with me today for moral support! You are right though - only I can make the decision whether or not to go. All thoughts greatly appreciated.
  14. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    I've tried changing the subject but she always brings it back again. I think as Grannie G said she is almost displaying the behaviour of a spoilt child. I suppose I just have to try and develop a very thick skin and not let it hurt me. Not sure I can do that though at the moment. It's so...
  15. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    Sorry, I meant to put then have won! If she lived round the corner it would be so much easier because I could pop in for 10 minutes and then leave if she was rude. Trouble is that it is about 2 hours door to door as she lives on the Isle of Wight.
  16. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    At the moment I can't decide whether it is actually worth going over to see her, for yet more verbal abuse. There is absolutely no point trying to reason with her, so I am not sure what a visit will achieve. Trouble is she will then have one, because she doesn't want me to go over anyway!!!!
  17. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    Thank you. You are right, I should just visit without ringing first. This is the only time I do ring. I have actually emailed the minister at the church mum attends to find out how she is with her friends, so hopefully I will get a reply soon. I have a very supportive husband but he feels...
  18. C

    Verbal and emotional abuse

    Sorry, it's me again. I really don't know what to do about Mum and I am finding it increasingly difficult to cope. I rang her (on the Isle of Wight) tonight to say that my husband and would be over tomorrow and she told me she didn't want me to go and that she never wanted me or any member of...
  19. C

    Am so cross and upset, again

    Thankyou I'll definitely try that. Trouble is I think she would be pleased sometimes if she doesn't see me. The last time, when I left, she said it was nice of me to come over and see her but not to do it again!!! How do you answer that one??
  20. C

    Am so cross and upset, again

    Thank you so much for all your comments. When I read the other posts on here I feel very guilty for moaning because so many of you have to put up with so much more. Perhaps as Helena says I ought to get angry back, but unfortunately it is not in my nature. I tend to get upset instead which...