• Expert Q&A: Rare dementias - Tues 3 March, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of rare dementias. It will be hosted by Nikki and Seb from Rare Dementia Support. If you have any questions about rare dementias, they will be here to answer them on Tuesday 3 March between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

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  1. O

    Can I do any more?

    Thank you Babymare01, all of the support Ive received on this subject is really helping. I think it is my own feelings of inadequacy which I have to put to one side for the sake of making the pathway clear for my beloved mum.
  2. O

    Last Words

    I cannot thank you enough Clive T for the honest and descriptive way you have written. My biggest fear is in only remembering the pain and anguish of my mum's last months, weeks and days. It's a trauma I dread, on top of the fear that I will never forgive myself for feeling as if I never did...
  3. O

    Can I do any more?

    Thank you yak55 and CraftyJ. As I said to a friend today, I have to put my 'big girl pants' on and get this difficult conversation underway. I think because the care home is registered as 'residential' and not 'nursing' it possibly is why this isn't made formal. At the beginning (and obviously...
  4. O

    Can I do any more?

    Oh canary, I am so grateful to you and the others who have answered me. Yes, there is a definite grimace and no smiling, I think I have sub consciously recognised this as not being a good sign. You and the other very kind TP responders have helped enormously. I will have the conversation...
  5. O

    What now?

    Hello Honeybears, thank you for sharing this very sad journey. I can only offer my sincere condolences and add that I feel you have been brave and dignified. Take care of you.
  6. O

    Can I do any more?

    Thank you so much Crafty J and LadyA. I have POA for health and welfare. Who do I speak to for DNR - would it be the home? I have no contact now with the hospital but the home have a visiting local doctor so I suppose I should discuss these things with her. I have seen her with mum for...
  7. O

    Can I do any more?

    I could not even find a title for this thread as I don't know what questions to ask. All I know for certain is that my poor mum is heading towards her final journey. No one can prepare you - they do not teach 'how to deal with parental suffering' in school. Neither are there lessons in 'guilt...
  8. O

    Refusal to socialise.

    Hello Netsy22 My Mum spent most of her adult life avoiding relationships (but this was due to having had meningitis when she was 23 - this destroyed her confidence and ability to relate to people in new situations. She did however join a singing group who sang to collect money for Imperial...
  9. O

    Refusal to socialise.

    Glad you could post Wayne, sorry you are feeling tired but will wait for your next blog instalment when you are feeling upto it. Just letting you know we're still here.
  10. O

    Moving to a care home.

    Perhaps you could take her initially for a cup of tea and cake or whatever. As if you are popping out together for afternoon tea or morning coffee. Then progress to lunch there, possibly then evening dinner (or whatever the home have during the evening). You can then introduce her to her room...
  11. O

    Really positive experience with bank regarding PoA

    Oh Wow - what a fantastic response from your bank - let's hope other financial institutions base their customer services on this experience. My experience with mum's bank was abysmal....
  12. O

    Something really positive to share about Mum's care home.

    I know how I felt 5 months ago - terrified of making the wrong decision. Hope my post gives you confidence Toddleo.
  13. O

    Something really positive to share about Mum's care home.

    Yes, I see your rolled eyes cragmaid! This home also runs a relative's cheese and wine evening on the first Wednesday of each month. They start with giving a short but very informative talk on any aspect of dementia. Relatives are encouraged to ask questions, no holds barred, and then the...
  14. O

    Something really positive to share about Mum's care home.

    Yup! - I'll bring the biscuits......:D
  15. O

    Something really positive to share about Mum's care home.

    I wanted to share a lovely experience. To quickly recap - Mum was diagnosed with mixed dementia nearly 4 years ago just after Dad died. She lived at home in their bungalow and refused any and all help. Spiralling downwards etc etc. Mum's difficulties were compounded with a longterm...
  16. O

    Lost my mam

    Oh Molly - what a wonderful caring daughter you have been. It can become a privilege to care at that level for a parent. I truly hope in time you can gather yourself and live a life your mother would be happy and proud of. My thoughts are with you.
  17. O

    Mother in law refuses help.

    As an additional comment I would add that a close friend was in a very similar position and in order to avoid the eventual 'car crash' she intervened. This was with all the very best intentions - the rest of her husband's family, including her husband turned what was a small crisis involving SS...
  18. O

    What is your local NHS Trust like?

    You are so right Sue J. Maybe in time all the information can be collated from this forum and used to help formalise a system of diagnosis and care in the future. X
  19. O

    Feeling sad

    Words of comfort for Bill and Christmas won't fill the void into which sadness sits. But I do hope that knowing you have friends on here helps, if only a little. Today may seem a little dark but tomorrow the sun may shine. X
  20. O

    Does age matter in family history of dementia?

    Hello Dayperson, It's sounds as if you have been very thorough and organised in preparation for your Mum's diagnosis. This is very commendable and Im guessing previous family history has helped to focus you. Try not to be worried about the process - take each day as it comes, visit TP when...