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    Lorazepam, sleeping pills.

    I used to feel like that too, but looking after yourself is as important as looking after the person you care for and sometimes you both need a break... which is what lorazepam provided for us. Mum would get so agitated and distressed, for hours on end; it was very hard to watch and exhausting...
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    Are people with Alzheimer’s regarded as extremely vunerable

    The problem is that if everyone with special needs qualified for a priority slot, nobody would ever get one, so they worked out what the supermarkets could realistically manage and gave a hefty proportion over to those they thought to be most in danger. My mother's ridiculously low (but...
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    When my mother was in hospital before Christmas, she responded very well to their 'soft platter' menu which is basically a plateful of finger food.... chips, sliced pepper (sometimes works, especially if it's red), bits of quiche, piece of cheese in finger form (easily picked up, not crumbly)...
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    Social Care

    Politicians are, generally, practical folk. They steered clear of this issue before, on the whole, because we couldn't afford a solution. The more you spend on medical care, the longer people live, the more you have to spend on social care for folk who tend to need more medical care. The more...
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    TV: Rhod Gilbert overcomes his inhibitions to become a carer

    I've just watched this, and for the first half or so I thought it avoided the tougher side of caring. But while it doesn't deal with dementia (not obviously anyway) and avoids too much controversy, by the end I thought this was a good show to recommend to folk who struggle to understand the...
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    Wants to go home

    Sadly this is one of the tougher stages of dementia to deal with. Most of us have been there already, and hopefully you'll find a lot of help in earlier discussions, as long as new advice in this thread.
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    I've got my first ever online delivery coming today, from Iceland. Tuesday I set up an account and made up an order, but there were no delivery slots. But I kept randomly looking, and on Wednesday morning at about 10:15 all of the next day's slots were suddenly available, so I got my chance to...
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    Hi. I look after and live with my 90 year old mum who has alzheimers. We have caredfor her for 2 years. Recently her hallucinations have become more p

    As lemonbalm says, it's all about reassurance and distraction. You'll struggle to convince your Mum she's imagining things, so become an expert at exorcising her ghosts rather than trying to tell her ghosts aren't real. My mother's past that phase now, but I used to "call the Police" and have a...
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    How to explain Covid-19 to someone with dementia

    Normal rules don't apply and explanation is meaningless. Concentrate on good reasons to stay in, rather than reasons not to go out. "You'll be having your lunch soon." "That programme you like on the radio is on in a bit." "I need to ring you again in a little while." "The forecast said it's...
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    Shielding Letter

    You're right. Mine's Tesco brand too. But psychologically, life's not the same without a five year out of date, partially evaporated, bottle of Ye Olde Original at the back of the cupboard, awaiting its last chance at culinary glory. Condiment of kings (and queens).
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    Shielding Letter

    I haven't, I just buy semiskimmed on autopilot. Actually Aldi's doesn't taste too bad, but Tesco's (far easier for me to get to on foot) is pretty vile in hot drinks. Ok for everything else, but... it's that beggars can't be choosers thing again, isn't it. Usually I get milk from the local Spa...
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    Shielding Letter

    I take my Mum out just up the path beside us and walk her round the little copse we're lucky enough to have locally. Nobody else walks there so I'm not too worried, even though the advice is that she shouldn't step outside. I'm more worried about 12 weeks of low exercise (the house and garden...
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    Shouting, chanting and talking all night long.........

    The memory clinic here gave me a small amount of lorazepam for use in emergencies, to break a behaviour cycle. Usually that was anger related, but these days it's lack of sleep which is most likely to make think about sneaking half a tablet into a piece of fudge. Weariness becomes a carer's...
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    Supermarket stop couples shopping

    Perfectly understandable measure by retailers to improve throughput, minimise queues & frustration, and of course to improve social distancing. Also discourages loitering and chatting. :-) But if Mum was still coming shopping with me, I'd ring the store and ask their advice. Exceptions are, I'm...
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    Just want to scream

    Supplies can be problematic at the moment, but milk shakes, ice cream, custard and angel delight are on my 'get fluid into Mum' list. She's not diabetic, thankfully, so I don't have to worry about low sugar options. Custard and angel delight can also have Complan or diet shake powder added to...
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    Officially a Poo-storm carer

    Ah, the club no 24/7 carer wants to join, but we all do eventually. I use one of these motion detectors to let me know when Mum's awake and potentially trying to get out of bed. It's saved me many times... and woken me up repeatedly for nothing serious many, many times. But while things are...
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    Urgent advice needed to prevent hospital discharge today

    Hospitals and supermarkets are among the most risky places to spend time at the moment. You cant blame them for wanting to get her home ASAP.
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    This is a useful read to help understand what's going on. It's not as bad as it might seem, though I realise it can seem pretty darned bad when you see the worst examples via social media.
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    Carers allowance

    I'm going to risk getting lynched, but -- speaking as someone whose only income has been carer's allowance for the last three years -- now is not the time for the government to be worrying about us. If anything we're in a position of strength because we're used to living off a very limited...