• Expert Q&A: Rare dementias - Tues 3 March, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of rare dementias. It will be hosted by Nikki and Seb from Rare Dementia Support. If you have any questions about rare dementias, they will be here to answer them on Tuesday 3 March between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

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  1. L


    The honeymoon is definitely over! Mom was sobbing to go home 2 days ago. Up until this point, since Feb 1, she has been content at her facility. Suddenly she became erratic, sobbing and inconsolable. Her meds are being adjusted. She used to fold laundry all the time. Now nothing. It broke...
  2. L


    Is there a "honeymoon" phase when placement in ALF occurs? My mother has been suffering from dementia for the past 4 years. It has progressed to the point that she needed 24-7 supervision. We had been told that it would take 2-6 months to get into a good ALF. The small private 10-bed...
  3. L

    Is it time?

    When we go to see Mom, as soon as she sees us, she says "Thank God!" She's doesn't say anything bad after that--just "Thank God." She doesn't beg to come home. Yesterday she did say "Let's get the hell out of here" followed by "I don't mean to stay, just get out for a little while." I think...
  4. L

    Is it time?

    Everything went remarkably well. We told Mom that we had plumbing problems and that the water would be cut off for a week or so and she would be staying at this boarding house. When she walked in the place, she immediately started smiling and talking to everybody. We haven't visited her yet...
  5. L

    Is it time for care home?

    If you think it is time, then you should at least look into care homes. Get a list together. Personally check them out. He will not get any better, so your proactive approach will pay off when the time comes. I am firm believer that you will KNOW when it is time. There will be no guessing...
  6. L

    Is it time?

    My brother admitted to me that he is glad Mom will be going away. Also admitted he is guilty/ashamed that he feels that way. I told him that I, too, had the same feelings. It so bittersweet. Brother and I both teared up a little then and ended up both of knowing that we are doing what is...
  7. L

    Is it time?

    Thanks everyone. I really appreciate your opinions. Much love
  8. L

    Is it time?

    Thanks, Lulabelle. Exactly what I needed to hear. The facility is locked in a rural area and has a pond on the grounds. I plan on doing a fishing and visiting with Momma.
  9. L

    Is it time?

    Yes, they do have wander-guard provisions. BUT HOW DO I GET HER OUT OF THE CAR AND INSIDE? Do I tell her upfront? Do I hide her suitcase and bags in the trunk until we get there?
  10. L

    Is it time?

    The ALF looked like enough. Nothing fancy. In a rural area with nice yard. It was clean and smelled of good food. Most of the residents appeared VERY elderly, much more so than my mother. I mentioned this to the proprietor and she said most of them had been with her for a number of years...
  11. L

    Decline in behaviour and mental state :(

    My mother went into respite care for 5 days. When she got out, she was a WRECK! It took almost a full week to see any similarity of her mentality before she went away for the 5 days. Now, almost 2 full weeks later, she is mostly back to us, but not fully. She is much more yearning to "go...
  12. L

    Is it time?

    Sister and I are going to look at a private 15-bed assisted living today. I am somewhat uncertain about assisted living as I understand they are more lax and less regulated. Anything anybody? What to look for? What to ask about?
  13. L

    Is it time?

    She was tested yesterday. All okay there. We thought she would come back to us, at least somewhat, but that has not happened and it's been almost a week now. She wants to go home and cries herself to sleep after "just wanting to walk" the halls at our home. We have decided. She is on the...
  14. L

    Is it time?

    My 84-year old mother with dementia went to a hospice respite car facility for 5 days last week. She has not be "right" since she returned Friday night. She is totally confused whereas before, she was not TOTALLY confused. She will not sleep. She is anxious ALL the time. My sister, my...
  15. L

    Oh, Lord, what to say and do to make things okay

    the last couple days, my mom has been asking when she is to be taken "home" when she IS at her own house. I tried to explain (yeah, I know, no sense trying to explain) that she WAS at her house. She does not believe that this is her house. She's been in it for over 15 years. there is no...
  16. L

    Experience 12 minutes in Dementia

    WOW. What a perspective. Thanks so much for sharing this. It has shaken me.
  17. L

    Confused: Is it early dementia and just Venting ...

    Totally understand. Sounds just like dementia. Just go along and be pleasant as can be. If your siblings won't include you, lucky you. I guess they will take care of everything in that case.
  18. L

    dealing with resentful husband

    Gill, I feel for you. I have feeling such as yours every now and again. My mother does not live with my husband and I but I usually spend Mon-Thurs nights with her at her home 30 miles away from my home. Then she comes to stay with us on the weekends. My bother stays with her during the day...
  19. L

    Signal to open bowels gone?

    This is EXACTLY what my mother did. She would also sit on at a tilt--not directly on her butt, almost all the time. She said her butt hurt. We thought she had hemorrhoids. She had rubbed her bottom almost raw trying to get something out of there. She was so uncomfortable which led to...
  20. L

    Still dithering - costs and is it the right time.

    I would say to keep him on the list and when the time comes, then make your decision. I think it will be clear, or at least clearer, after a month or so. You can't make decisions based on one week's passage.