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  1. Dimelza

    Children Of Dementia

    Hi Quilty I lost my dad on 26/1/16. He'd had dementia for 8+ years but was only 72. He'd lived with us until he had a massive stroke late last year which meant he needed 24 hour care and he went into a care home. He declined rapidly after this. I'm not even sure I've grieved since he died. I...
  2. Dimelza

    I still can't believe I've reached this page

    Sorry Scarlett I went back to work and then it's been half term for my youngest two do I disappeared! Mum left dad 22 years ago and moved 200 miles away. She has a partner but they don't live together however they've gone off on a 10 week cruise now so I think she'll be ok... I'm feeling most...
  3. Dimelza

    I still can't believe I've reached this page

    Hi again Feeling very odd today, tearful, snappy, irritable. My family aren't helping much by bickering and arguing and sulking and ignoring the fact I need a bit of calm and tlc. Would like to clear off to bath and early night but my mums travels home tomorrow so I can't really abandon her...
  4. Dimelza

    Just talking. It has taken me 18 months...

    Oh how wonderful! My mum is still with us but she has a 3 month cruise every new year, this would be perfect when it's her time! I'd never have thought of it.
  5. Dimelza

    I still can't believe I've reached this page

    Such kind and wise words again, this really is such a magical place. Well, dad had the most wonderful send off, 125 people were there! Wow! So many from years ago as well as more recent friends. I managed the eulogy with just a few deep breaths and a couple of people asked to read it...
  6. Dimelza

    I still can't believe I've reached this page

    Thanks mal2 and kjn. Awake already but we are collected at 915 so I'm getting up soon to make sure I'm organised and one last run through of what I'm going to say. My husband read it for me last night and even he shed a tear! I wake up feeling like I've someone sitting on my chest but it just...
  7. Dimelza

    I still can't believe I've reached this page

    Thank you all. It's one of my favourites. I'm concerned though. I've barely shed a tear or felt anything since dad died. People around are visibly upset but I'm just flat.
  8. Dimelza

    So tired

    Oh Tony I wish I could advise you, but I was exactly the same with my lovely dad. I've no idea how on earth I'm going to deal with not going. My brother and dads little sister visited too but I still had to go. Just try and relax in others ways. Can you take shorter visits perhaps.
  9. Dimelza

    My sister is gone

    I'm so sorry for your loss. That must be so hard :( I'm reading my eulogy for my dad. I've no idea how it'll go but I'll try xxx
  10. Dimelza

    Funeral

    Hi Sonia. I hope your mums funeral goes well. Love xxxx
  11. Dimelza

    Best wishes for the newly bereaved, planning& attending funerals this week

    Thank you leedslass. My dads funeral is also Friday. 0940 which is good I think. I'm ready. But it feels like an awfully long time to wait. Sending much love and strength xx
  12. Dimelza

    I still can't believe I've reached this page

    I'm doing ok. Too well I think. Barely any tears, not much sadness. I've made all the arrangements for dads funeral. Chosen music, readings and photographs for the slideshow. Ordered floral tributes. Written my personal eulogy. I wonder if the fact I'd given dad permission to go, and felt I...
  13. Dimelza

    End OF Life Care

    Thank you so much for your kind word xxx I'm doing ok. Only feel tearful when condolences abd memories others have of my dad come. Hoping to register his death first thing today (one last fight for my dad as the gp practice have been useless once again and haven't organised this) then funeral...
  14. Dimelza

    End OF Life Care

    My dad passed away at 22:19 last night. It was so peaceful and me, my mum, my brother and dads lovely sister were there. Thank you so much for the fabulous advice and support. Unbeatable xxxx
  15. Dimelza

    End OF Life Care

    Dads looking wonderful today. He's had a shave and a really good mouth clean out. Smells sweeter than me and looks younger too haha he'd love to tell me that ☺️☺️
  16. Dimelza

    End OF Life Care

    Thank you nanny. I'm having a glass of wine watching Call The Midwife in peace. Chaucer. My heart is breaking for you. It's hit me hard suddenly that soon I'll never see or touch my dad ever again. I feel so so lucky to have these precious days with him.
  17. Dimelza

    End OF Life Care

    Welcome Jane23 it's a fantastic place. I barely have time to post but it's so useful for information and support. Lady thank you for asking. Just got home. Had a few scary moments today but dads still with us. Amazingly. But we were chatting and realised he's never had a single day off work...
  18. Dimelza

    How long have you been a carer?

    I've cared for my dad since 2007. He suffered a stroke during a hip replacement operation and was diagnosed with mixed dementia 4 years later after a long hard battle! I worked part time back then as my youngest were only 2&4 but started working full time in 2012. His needs became more acute in...
  19. Dimelza

    End OF Life Care

    Thanks shedrech. How are you?
  20. Dimelza

    End stages

    Oh Wendy and timeout I'm sorry you're going through this. Fortunately in a way that phase only last a week or two, in fact he had a Christmas dinner albeit fed to him, that's how rapid his decline. But I think every person is different. Dad only has days left at most now and I'm grateful for...