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    Is this common

    Mmm this is how it effects some people, phasing in and out is the new normal. Suggest to the doubters they do some research. I suggested this in the kindest way and found the worse offenders never raised the matter again:D I don't actually believe they researched anything because they still...
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    Bleak outlook for mum

    Hope she and you are ok such a difficult time:(
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    Alzheimer's and Hearing Aids

    Hi 1) yes and forgets how to replace batteries, or that the tune means batteries need changing. 2) not bluetooth, but if there was a way to send messages, could be good. 3) not sure how would know if message received, but then that could be the case with a fixed speaker as well!
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    Bed time

    Hi Caseys I think 9pm is a reasonable bedtime and introduced the same for my mother. She started living with us 3 years ago and it used to be 10 o'clock. It is really important to get "time off" and if she was in residential care I expect it would be earlier than 9pm. I also managed to...
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    Hi Lightworker. You really don't need a solicitor the forms are simple, you do need an independent person who knows your friend to verify her capability (this could be her GP, they sometimes charge a fee). Relatives will need to be notified and this is part of the process that the office of...
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    Hi SarahJane It depends where you live what services might be available to you, I googled and looked in local paper and eventually found 2 very good local services that the GP and social services hadn't been aware of. I also use Age uk who run a service which picks up and drops off too which...
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    Advice please :)

    mmm sorry don't really know legal position for you and brother but rules have changed and don't think people have to sell their homes to fund care anymore. If your in UK I think a legal charge goes on the deeds meaning that when he dies and the property is sold the care would be funded out of...
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    The normality of Dementia

    Hi Flake The normal which is so bizarre it becomes a parallel life. I live my life in 2 worlds in 1 house and:) still sometimes laugh at how surreal it can be. Like you I am just happy mum doesn't realise. :)
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    Could anyone help me please?

    Hi Lisa It would be a shame if your nan had to move as she sounds settled where she is. Have you thought about movement sensors I know there are companies who install and you can get a signal to a phone (if you have a smart phone) or if someone is technical minded in the family there are...
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    Won't use toilet for no 2 help

    Hi Certainly not the nicest thing to have to deal with and your concerns about granchildren is understandable. Wondering if he could use a commode, you can get LLoyd loom ones on ebay that look like a nice wicker chair and you just lift the seat to use. Best wishes
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    Reality bites-this is not how I thought it would be

    Oh I realised when I posted I was not at the end of your thread and that David has since passed away so sorry for what must seem insensitive, I hope your ok you did brilliantly in terrible circumstances.
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    Reality bites-this is not how I thought it would be

    Sounds such a horrible place to be.. you are suffering, as is David, he is so lucky to have you there for him and you are coping even when it seems such a hugh ask. I hope things improve for you real soon it is hardly surprising you are upset.
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    Its worth it all

    Just wanted to say.... If you are like me at all you will - cry, worry, wonder, clean, wash, feed, dress, reassure, arrange, juggle, sacrifice, cry again, repeat, repeat, repeat, loose, find, and keep going. After sharing my life and home in a way I never imagined I am rewarded with - a...
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    Problems with Siblings

    I feel for you as I know how difficult siblings can be at the same time as contributing little in terms of support or care. I weep when I see how niave I was about the support of siblings with parents who need care. Family used to be so important to me but my experience, being the 3rd year of...
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    I'd appreciate any advice

    Hi Mother Goose. Our circumstance sounds very similar so just wanted to say keep your chin up - I know how difficult this can be. Try not to be upset by your mothers favouritism, she is relying on you and your family and knows she gets real support from you (hence her asking for more). Your...
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    Feeling sad

    Hi thebel2405 Its horrible isn't it. I always just carry on as it seems less painful than explaining. If the mistake is recognised or suspected I make a joke about not knowing who I am sometimes, it usually works and the moment passes more quickly. It is very painful to experience as a...
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    Financial management

    Hi Travellor. We just don't imagine its going to happen until it does, sorry you have these worries. You need to get a Lasting Power of Attorney completed for yourself so attorneys can act on your behalf. There are 2, one for finances and one for care, you choice who you want to have (could be...
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    Thanks Izzy Yes the medication is Aricept for mild to moderate dementia but is causing stomach upset. Mum is not officially living with us yet and is from a different county so I don't think I can register for anything but I will bear the assessments in mind for after we have registered her...
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    Thanks Chemmy for the thought on what happens next. I will work through the link you provided, our gut reaction is that she will stay with us but I can see from other posts that this is not a decision to take lightly.
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    Hi I am new to this forum and the topic of dementia. My mother came to stay with us 7 weeks ago and she started on medication 3 weeks ago. She had fainted while at the shops and was in no condition to look after herself. I had originally thought she might improve enough to go home but I now...