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  1. W

    Is this normal for care homes re incontinence and a couple of other things!

    Definitely insist they send a fresh urine sample off to be tested. They can actually dip it at the home as most have dipsticks in stock. It is always best though to have one sent to the lab for proper testing. That sample needs to be flushed down the toilet now as can't be used. If a sample...
  2. W

    Care home problems for ex carers and relations

    Care homes don't like families complaining or even asking too many questions. Our loved ones are under their care and we should leave them to it is the attitude I have witnessed. What they should understand is that whilst it is their paid job to look after our loved ones, they don't and can't...
  3. W

    Reminded dad mum had died, did I do the right thing?

    If mum ever says "where's your dad", I will say he is helping my brother with the garden and won't be long. If however she says "your dad's not alive now is he" then I will reply that he isn't and talk about my dad and our lives when he was alive. I adapt my answer according to what mum...
  4. W

    Is This True?

    I would just ignore it. No 2 people are the same and what I have learned from all of my research is that whilst Alzheimer's eventually affects all of the brain and is usually slower to progress, vascular and other types of dementia affects part(s) of the brain and that is why often some skills...
  5. W

    Dementia-friendly hair salons

    Hi. The hairdresser rents the salon and is not employed by the home. I just borrow the key now and do mum's hair myself when the salon is closed. What equipment is there as maybe she uses it and I wasn't aware? Every time I wash mums hair it is a struggle as I can't get her close enough to...
  6. W

    Worried mum will get kicked out of care home as they "don't know what to do with her"

    I too would be calling the CQC or CCG to raise your concerns about the place she's in. You don't have to say who you are. Does the home belong to a chain as if so, you could contact head office with your concerns re the level of care. As frightening as sectioning sounds, sometimes it is the...
  7. W

    Continuous care

    I think you could ask any of those mentioned. If your mum already has a social worker I would probably ask them as they will be involved in the process.
  8. W

    Dementia-friendly hair salons

    My mum is in a care home with a very modern, well equipped hair salon. However, if you aren't able to have a back wash (which mum isn't because of problems with her back) then she gets drenched as the sinks are pedestals and you can't get close to them because of the big padded pedestal at the...
  9. W

    Loved ones in a Care Home.

    Oh I'm so glad they are carrying out a meds review. They need to get to the bottom of it as it's very distressing for both of you. Carers don't always know what's best and I'm sure you will use your own judgement as to how often you visit. Take care.
  10. W

    Loved ones in a Care Home.

    Geof, it could be because she doesn't know who to tell when you're not there. My mum often tells me she has headache/backache/sore throat etc. but yet the staff say she never mentions any aches and pains to them. The staff don't spend a lot of time sitting with our loved ones like we do, so...
  11. W

    Section 2 to DOLS

    How on earth is a nursing home able to deal with behavioural problems more than an EMI unit. My father-in-law (now deceased) who suffered from post stroke psychosis, was assessed and deemed not fit to return home as he was having terrible mood swings and showing signs of aggressive behaviour...
  12. W

    Loved ones in a Care Home.

    I personally don't think its any easier having a parent in care than a partner. It might be for some but not others. My dear mum has been in a care home for 2 years now, originally for respite which turned into permanent care as the rest of the family thought she was happier and healthier. I...
  13. W


    Hi I don't understand why the manager has told you she has received written complaints about your mum hitting visitors. She should have looked into the circumstances around the incidents and discussed them with you. Did you get a phone call when any of these incidents happened? Also, have...
  14. W

    Doll Therapy

    It's interesting to see different views. Perhaps I should have said mum is able to have conversations with us and others. She enjoys talking and laughing with people and the last thing we want to happen is for her to lose interest in others because she has this doll. I understand they work...
  15. W

    Doll Therapy

    One of the carers has decided to bring a baby doll in for a particular resident. My mum worries about children all of the time and often says she has to get home to see to the children. Since this doll has arrived, mum who is mobile and enjoys conversations with family and staff and is very...
  16. W

    Urine infection?

    From my experience a sudden change is usually down to a UTI/Chest Infection/Constipation or any kind of pain. UTI's affect people in very different ways and some like your mum will behave completely out of character and, have huge amounts of energy, whilst others will just be quieter than...
  17. W

    audit of clothes in nursing home

    I would make a list of everything that is missing with a rough cost of what you paid then present it to the Manager. They can put the claim through their insurance.
  18. W

    Consultant has decided to put a DNR order on my Dad

    It's terrible. Last year when mum was in A&E with pneumonia, a grim looking registrar was eyeing up patients in cubicles and decided to come to me after my sister had left and asked for a word. He asked if we had thought about a DNR, I replied no we hadn't. He went into graphic detail of...
  19. W

    Visiting mum in home for the first time

    I am glad your mum was ok. My mum went into residential care over 12 months ago as my brother and sister thought it was the best decision as mum was actually happier than when she was at home. I still can't accept she is there even thought it is like a 5* hotel and not like a care home at...