Mom looking for stuff from 40 years ago?

[Mo-Mo]

I NEED HELP. I recently moved my 75 year old Mom out of her house in another state and into a house about 3 miles from me because she has stage 4 Alzheimers. At first she was excited about the move and being with family. When the moving van arrived, she cried with joy. 3 weeks later, she has nearly daily mood swings settling into her new home. I know this is common in Alzheimers, but my Mom is looking for belongings from 40 years ago. Things we dont own anymore, and she is very combative, insisting that somehow we got rid of it? What do I do? She is so nasty and combative to the point that nobody wants to be around her. She even called a friend in her old state to go look in the closet of her bedroom to check on things she was looking for, and it was quite embarrassing. WHAT CAN I DO???

 

[Badietta]

Hi Mo-Mo

I' so very sorry to hear about the difficulties with your Mom and I'm not surprised that you feel at the end of your tether. We went through something similar with my MIL many years ago when we had no alternative but to move her into a Care Home. I reckon it's all about the actual moving thing. They want to go, but then can't cope with all the changes that this involves. It took about 6/8 weeks but she then settled down and became very happy and responsive again. I realize that it's hard, but sit it out and it will become so much easier.

Badietta

 

[cragmaid]

Say they got lost and tell her you'll look for some more tomorrow. Tell her it must have been an accident and that box fell off the van.....How careless someone must have been.

Then get her checked for a UTI just in case it is more than new home symptoms.

 

[CareGiver-1]

I NEED HELP. ... my Mom is looking for belongings from 40 years ago.

Been there so many times. It is truly exasperating. I do a "pretend search" with my MIL, then say I am tired of looking, and say I need a beer, would she like one. I make a little snack plate to go with it, we sit on the porch and watch the birds eat at the feeder. I don't mention the missing item any more. She will have me searching for something different next time and we start the cycle all over again.