How to keep your sanity?

BellaT

Registered User
Nov 14, 2010
10
0
South Yorkshire
I just need to let off steam...

I've spent much of the last two days sorting and battling on mum's behalf:

1. Had to write to care manager of domicilliary care agency because mums bed was left soiled for several days and I had to change the sheets. She lives in very sheltered accommodation with domicilliary care on site.
2. Had to sort out district nurse referral that should have resulted in nurses visiting mum on a daily basis a week ago and also the associated prescription had gone astray. So mum has continued to be more confused and uncomfortable because she hasn't received the treatment she needs.
3. Am sorting out her tax return very late and just spoke to her former accountant to find out some information. He was very rude to me just because I no longer use his services on her behalf (he lives a couple of hundred miles away in the town where she used to live until 12 months ago)
4. Chased council about the blue badge application I made for mum a couple of months ago!

In amongst it all I try to spend time with mum - I wound up in tears yesterday because I tried to get her to accept some more help with daily tasks. I also try to give my two young kids ( aged 6 and 9) and husband some love and attention...

My working week starts tomorrow and my stress levels are already through the roof! And there is no other family anywhere within 200 miles to help take the strain.

So my question is what do you do to remain sane?!
 

Anniewragby

Registered User
Mar 20, 2013
46
0
You are trying to do too much. I'm afraid I didn't ask my parents if they wanted more help - i just arranged it and they accepted it. Your children need you: phone a care agency and get some nice ladies to help your Mum and take the other battles one a day - you'll get it sorted in the end.
 

kenroy

Registered User
Jan 10, 2014
3
0
Warwickshire
Hi Bella t
I use to think that I was alone travelling this path but it did not take long to realise its a well trodden path by so many others not so fortunate or well equipped for this rough path.
I look for the positives in life. When I get time off for good behaviour I take my 2 dogs for a long walk and take in my surroundings to help me forget my troubles and the occassional odd bottle of beer helps too.
Some of us face this ordeal alone with no support from any family to talk to just the four walls.
Put it down to just a bad day tomorrow will be better that what I tell myself.

Peace and best wishes.
 

BellaT

Registered User
Nov 14, 2010
10
0
South Yorkshire
You are trying to do too much. I'm afraid I didn't ask my parents if they wanted more help - i just arranged it and they accepted it. Your children need you: phone a care agency and get some nice ladies to help your Mum and take the other battles one a day - you'll get it sorted in the end.

Thanks for your thoughts. She does have carers ( I don't think she sees them as nice ladies!) but doesn't recognise the need for more help and gets cross with people when she thinks she can do things herself! But you are right I will just organise more help in the hope that she lets them help her.

Thanks for your thoughts!
 

BellaT

Registered User
Nov 14, 2010
10
0
South Yorkshire
Hi Bella t
I use to think that I was alone travelling this path but it did not take long to realise its a well trodden path by so many others not so fortunate or well equipped for this rough path.
I look for the positives in life. When I get time off for good behaviour I take my 2 dogs for a long walk and take in my surroundings to help me forget my troubles and the occassional odd bottle of beer helps too.
Some of us face this ordeal alone with no support from any family to talk to just the four walls.
Put it down to just a bad day tomorrow will be better that what I tell myself.

Peace and best wishes.

Yes Im sure you are right. And of course there are always others in a much worse position me!
 

dottyd

Registered User
Jan 22, 2011
1,063
0
n.e.
Yes Im sure you are right. And of course there are always others in a much worse position me!

My cousins care agency for her mother were absolute rubbish. Putting her mum to bed in damp sheets and do on.

After many battles, eventually they got sacked and the new ones are much better.

Trouble is a lot of carers are young girls with little experience, maybe not even changed a nappy and then find they have to do a full cleanse of an adult body!!
 

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