Well I am still here - actually I have given myself a couple of hours off to feed my family, but generally I have been with father for most of every day.
My brother has gone home, but was really helpful, which was a nice surprise.
Pa seems to be surviving on 3 teaspoons of food or drink every 2 days. We aren't sure how, and he really does seem to be at the end now. He is praying and saying that he has seen his father, who died in 1956.
I find that comforting, but he is such a shadow, and I am filled with dread about how I am going to manage afterwards.
I have given him reassurance that all will be fine, and it is fine to let go, but I can't help but feel that he is waiting for my next visit. Hard to visit, hard not to. I have no regrets about the decisions I made about his care, but I really don't want to get this last bit wrong.
I think a small sherry may be needed to counterbalance all the tea and tears.
Lizzie